Hope Springs Eternal
by williewildcat
Summary: Shane and Rick weren't expecting to see her alive after the zombie apocalypse yet Alex was standing there alive and well. How do Shane and Rick react to her return? What will this mean for the survivors? And what secrets does she bring with her arrival? Shane/OC with implied Rick/OC...R&R :
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

I started watching The Walking Dead and totally love it hence giving inspiration for this latest work by me….Fear not as my other stories I have not forgotten but have some writer's block…..

This starts up during Tell It to The Frogs after Rick and the others arrive at the camp…

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><p>The roar of the Harley garnered everyone's attention.<p>

Andrea was the first to see the black cycle and rider ride over the horizon followed by three other vehicles.

"Hey we got more coming," she hollered and pointed at the approaching caravan. The leader of the ragtag group began to decelerate as the gears were downshifted to first. The Harley came to a complete stop a hundred yards away from the camp with the other vehicles following suit. An F-150, Chevy Colorado, and Ford Fusion made up the rest of the traveling group. Rick was first to greet the strangers as they exited from the trucks and car. The rider kicked the stand down letting the bike come to a well deserved rest. It had been pushed for nearly 1000 miles over plains, through woodlands, and at last over the Appalachians in the tireless search for other survivors.

"Thank god," the driver of the F-150 exhaled with unbridled elation. "We were starting to think we were the only ones between here and Saint Louis!"

He was a Hispanic man of about 25 with a fresh crew cut and Army fatigues. His passenger was another man of 21 with olive skin and weary blue eyes. The younger man said nothing as his eyes scanned the growing group before them, taking in the various walks of life standing across the way.

"Well we're glad we're not," a woman hollered from the Colorado. She appeared to be in her mid 30s with shoulder length locks of midnight. Rick quickly deduced she was Native American from her rich copper skin and piercing features. She was more open in her expression unlike her younger companion. The driver of the Fusion was a college student. He looked no older than 18 but his eyes revealed two haunted emerald jewels that were dull where vitality should've made them shine.

The rider looked over their shoulder and nodded at them as if to say it was alright to relax. By now Shane was standing alongside Rick as the rider removed the black scratched helmet revealing their face.

It was the last person Shane or Rick expected to see…..Alive.

"Hi Rick, hi Shane," the woman greeted the men with a casual wave. "You two look like you've seen a ghost."

"Alex?" Rick tilted his head, bewildered at the brunette standing with the helmet in hand. Shane's mouth dropped as he thought he would've had to pinch himself. The last time either one had seen Alexandra "Alex" Koch was after graduating from high school. Sure she had made the occasional call or letter after going to Kansas State but they had tapered off but a few years ago. But now….

"The one and only," Alex smiled. Shane started for the smaller woman and instantly wrapped her in his larger arms.

"It's so good seeing you," he squeezed her harder threatening to cut off her air. Alex coughed and gasped for every breath that she could.

"Shane….can't breathe…."

"Sorry," he let her down. Shane noticed how well she looked given what's happened. But the heavy dark circles lined her eyes told the lawman another story too.

"It's okay," she shrugged. "You never knew your own strength even in high school or middle school."

Rick cautiously approached as Lori and Carl looked on. Lori could see her husband and Alex knew one another and had a previous relationship of some kind. She wasn't sure what to make of this new development as she silently observed the two.

"It's been a long time Rick," Alex fiercely embraced her old friend. "But it's good to see familiar faces."

"We heard you were in Kansas."

"Was," Alex nodded. "But when all of this happened a few of us made it out of Manhattan and stuck to the back roads. We had 11 but we lost several in Saint Louis and outside Nashville."

"You came all the way from Kansas?" Andrea asked in astonishment.

"Yeah," Alex nodded. "We were lucky to make it out of Kansas City. It's infested with those things."

"We call them walkers," Daryl spoke up. "We call those things walkers."

Alex looked over at the man with disheveled brown hair and crossbow resting comfortably in his hands.

"I call them targets," the older soldier added with a smile.

"I suppose we should make a few introductions," Alex waved towards her team. "These two fine servicemen are Mike and Chris."

Mike and Chris waved.

"This is Ashley," Ashley waved but didn't move away from the Colorado.

"And this is Austin," Austin jerked his head up in his way of greeting others. "So where is everyone going?"

"Right now that's up in the air," Rick explained. "But some of us are heading into Atlanta to retrieve supplies and guns."

"Have you heard anything about the CDC still standing? I lost contact with Dr. Jenner somewhere before Saint Louis. We were using CB radios but then something happened and the other end went silent."

Rick shook his head deflating any hope Alex held. "We haven't heard anything."

"Well we're headed there so if anyone wants to join us you're more than welcome to."

She looked around the group catching a few looks of thought mixed in with hesitation. Shane quietly weighed his options. Rick had returned which devalued his status as leader within the band of survivors. Everyone was slowly turning to him for guidance which kindled resentment in the man. The proposition of heading to Atlanta with Alex was a most tempting one indeed. Lori had blown him off once Rick had been found alive when a few days ago she couldn't keep her hands off of him!

"Well I'm going back to Atlanta," Rick announced.

"I'll go," a young Asian kid chimed in.

"Yeah me too," an African- American man added.

"Well you're not forgetting me," Alex announced with certainty.

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><p><em><strong>AN 2:** _Alex is a new OC that I created for Walking Dead Verse. This is my first WD story so please be kind and I have a good outline of how this will go so if you want more let me know! I have a pretty good back story for Alex and how she ties in to the whole zombie infestation :)

_**A/N 3: **_And yes despite Shane pining over Lori, Alex will serve to help him get over her as honestly I didn't like how Lori brushed him off once Rick returned...But then again his continued longing for her is not healthy ;)


	2. Chapter 2

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

_**A/N 2: **_I got Alex's name from Alexander Fleming who was credited for discovering penicillin and her last name is from Robert Koch who developed the Koch's Postulates, his 4 step theory which led to the discovery of many pathogens including typhoid ;)

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><p>"No way," Shane wasn't thrilled with the idea.<p>

"I'm a big girl now," Alex argued back. "I'm not the scrawny kid you remember from school."

"It doesn't matter to me," he pursed his lips tightly together. "We need more people staying here to guard the camp. We had a Walker attack us before you showed up."

"What? But Jim said they didn't come up here!"

"Well he said they may be running out of food down in the city so they're moving out."

"Oh my god," Alex started pacing nervously beneath the massive tree. She carded a hand through her hair as her heart raced against her ribs. "This is not good."

"Understatement of the century," Shane snorted sarcasticaly. "Rick's gonna put us all at risk if he goes back."

"He said he left a small arsenal behind in Atlanta which you and I both know will give us at least some leverage over the Walkers. We can't fight them with clubs and bats Shane. I've seen what the Walkers do when they gather in a group. I saw it in Saint Louis with my own eyes; mob mentality takes over. One of my survivors was ripped to literal shreds at the base of the Arch. His screams and pathetic attempts for prayer still haunt me Shane. I will be _damned _if I lose another one to those fucking things."

Shane was slightly taken aback by Alex. It was obvious she had been witness to more of the Walkers than he had been. It had embittered and tormented her for her words and shaky tone spoke for themselves. She sounded more like an old embattled war vet than the girl he remembered.

"Alex I didn't know…."

"Save it," she held up a hand and looked up at him. The hardness around her eyes softened, lifting the darkness from her face. "It's been a literal Hell for us since we escaped Manhattan. Not all survivors were as hospitable as you guys. Mike had to put a bullet between a man's eyes in Saint Genevieve when he tried raping Ash."

"Christ…."

"Yeah," Alex nodded and rubbed her eyes. "But I have to get to the CDC."

"You're not going anywhere," Rick called out. He hiked up the small hill where Shane and Alex stood.

"Again I am not the scrawny kid you remember," Alex huffed. Seriously what was it with these two?

"But I need you here," Rick gently argued.

"I can handle my own."

"Really now?" Rick was intrigued.

"Do you really think I didn't pick up a few things out west? Mike and Chris are both excellent marksmen."

"Which means you can help keep watch while I'm gone."

"Damn it Rick!"

"Rick we're sitting ducks here," Shane sharply interjected.

"Which is why we need those guns and supplies and I need to find my walkie talkie to warn Morgan and his son about the Walkers." Rick continued to ignore Shane's climbing resentment as he argued with Alex.

"Who's Morgan?" Alex raised an eyebrow.

"Someone who saved my life," Rick explained. "He said the CDC was working on a possible cure for this. Do you know anything about that?"

Shane and Rick watched Alex's face scrunch first into confusion before shifting to contemplation. Several seconds passed before she finally said anything.

"No," she finally admitted. "But I heard Doctor Jenner was working on finding out how the body was affected and what specifically triggered reanimation. But that was right before I lost contact."

"Again we can't afford to lose you," Rick held his ground. "If I have to tie you up and throw you in Dale's RV I'll do it."

"Then at least take someone from my group."

"Already ahead of ya Boss," Mike had a duffel bag slung across his shoulder. "Ash said she would go too. I can't wait to take out a few of those bastards!"

Alex closed her eyes but nodded in agreement. "Okay you two go. But here's a list of things we need if you get access to a hospital or pharmacy."

She passed a folded paper over to Mike who tucked it in his pants. Shane caught the exchange between the two as they communicated with facial expressions. He wondered what was going on but decided it would be best to ask when everyone wasn't around.

"Now that the matter's been settled," Rick broke the uneasy silence. Shane pulled the gun from his waistband and dumped the remaining bullets into his waiting hand.

"Here," he begrudgingly handed the ammunition over. "Four men, four rounds; let's just hope that four is your lucky number."

Alex frowned at the chilly exchange between the two men and wondered what could have brought about this fracture in their friendship. In high school they were inseparable as a trio, always getting one another's back when needed. This wasn't like Shane at all. No, something was definitely wrong and Alex was determined to find out what.

* * *

><p>"I guess we can make camp for now," Alex told Austin and Chris. "We can set up over here by the cars but still be close to the others."<p>

"So you know those two cops?" Chris collected the tents from the back of the truck.

"Yeah," Alex sighed with a growing heavy heart. "We were tight in high school; we'd spend Friday nights drinking beer by the creek then sneak home before my dad got off shift. He was the county sheriff."

"Well those two didn't seem as cozy as you like to describe it," Austin chimed in while pounding stakes in the Georgia soil. It wasn't hard like Alabama clay but still an effort to drive the metal spike in nonetheless.

"I noticed," Alex dryly not as she watched Shane starting down the path to the quarry. "You know I'll be right back. I'm gonna see where we can wash clothes."

"Right," Chris teased as Alex hiked down the trail and vanished in the woods.

**I hope everyone will continue to read and enjoy this! I will say that Shane and Alex will butt heads a few times but then again it makes the moment they finally click better ;)**


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

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><p><em>"I bet you won't!"<em>

_ "Oh yeah? Watch me!"_

Alex smiled inwardly as she remembered the time she dared Shane to climb across the fallen pine tree over the creek while taking shots of Jack. It wasn't an easy feat as the tree was slick and falling in the icy water had been a real danger. Shane had called her out and downed not one but two bottles of Jack while crossing not once but twice. Rick had shook his head but laughed at their friend's success as they finished off the stash of whiskey in victory.

_"Show off!"_

He had flashed that million dollar smile that made all of the girls throw themselves at his feet making her turn red against the gentle glow of orange and yellow across the sky.

But those carefree days were over. Replaced with the cold reality that survival was a daily struggle and the next day harbored nothing but certain death with one wrong decision or moment of carelessness.

Alex took a deep breath, letting the crisp air settle in her lungs for a moment before exhaling. Rotted flesh and the stench of death had clung to her skin and clothing but out here she along with the group were liberated, granted reprieve from the constant battle to live another day.

She made her way down the path which opened up to the quarry ahead. Andrea, Carol, Amy, and Jacqui were doing laundry while some distance to her right Shane was spotted with Rick's son Carl.

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><p>"I told you I would bring ya down here to catch frogs."<p>

Shane and Carl were both kneeling at the water's edge waiting and watching. A bucket sat to one side as a net was held in Carl's hands, poised to scoop up the first unsuspecting amphibian.

Alex stood at the edge of the trail, observing the two as Shane tried driving them into the waiting net. But the rocks were slippery and his boots couldn't stay steady against the algae covered stones. She suppressed a laugh as Shane stumbled in the murky water. He huffed in faux irritation as Alex casually strolled down the path.

"Nice one," she headed towards him. Shane accepted her outstretched hand and rose to his feet.

"You think you can do better?"

"Maybe," she shrugged but her eyes shined like two perfect sapphires.

"Is that a challenge Alex?" His eyebrow arched in amusement.

"Do you think it is?"

"Yeah, I think so," Shane smirked in acceptance of her dare. Alex's grin grew wider as she turned to Carl and opened her hand.

"You still want Cajun-style Kermit legs?"

"Yeah," Carl eagerly nodded. He passed the net over and watched as Alex looked around then spotted a beetle scurrying across the grass.

"You can't catch a fly with vinegar or should I say frog," she winked at the boy then plucked the bug up and placed it at the water's edge. It wasn't but five seconds before the first frog took the bait. The explosion of water was short but powerful as the bullfrog was swept from its watery sanctuary and unceremoniously dumped in the bucket. The water quickly settled from the froth rage that had transpired moments before.

"Your turn," she presented the net for Shane. He chuckled at her victory.

"Beginner's luck," he took two steps closer towards her. "Watch a pro."

"Right," she teased.

As Shane turned his back towards her Lori stomped through the trees and marched right up to the edge of the water.

"Carl, go back up to the camp now. I told you not leave Dale," she firmly instructed her son. Lori then glared upward at Alex who was genuinely confused. "I need to speak to Shane, alone."

"Sure," Alex backed away then started towards the others but moved slow enough to hear bits and pieces of the tense heated exchange.

_"You stay away from me and stay the Hell away from my son!"_

Alex pretended to look for worms for fishing but continued to eavesdrop on Shane and Lori. What the Hell was Lori's problem? Why was she hostile to Shane?

_"We need to talk Lori…."_

_ "Well tell it to the frogs! I have nothing more to say to you!"_

_ "Why are you so angry? Do you think I'm not happy Rick's alive?"_

Alex felt her heart pounding as she wasn't sure what she was hearing. Why wouldn't Shane be happy about Rick being alive?

_"Why would you be Shane? My husband is back and alive! You're the one who told me he was dead!"_

Alex knelt a few feet from the others, the back of her hand rested against her lips. What the fuck was going on? Did Shane do something to Lori or Carl? No, Carl would've been more inverted and weary around Shane but he wasn't. The kid had been enjoying his time with Shane up until his mom broke it up. No, something happened between Lori and Shane…..

"Oh my god," she whispered. Alex didn't want to entertain the idea but her gut instinct was telling her otherwise. Shane and Lori had an affair? No, she didn't want to believe it! Her friend would never betray Rick like that? Would he?

_"Don't think I won't knock you on your ass!"_

The threatening tone shook her thoughts as Alex shot her head up in time to see Ed belting his wife, Carol, across the face. She wasn't the only one who heard the assault. Shane charged by and tackled Ed violently to the ground. The fatter man was no match for the solid wall of fury and fists.

"Shane stop!"

Alex leapt to her feet as the women looked on in horror. Shane pummeled Ed in the face, letting his fists strike the man across the cheeks, nose, and eyes. Alex raced past the women whose eyes remained trained on Shane.

"Please…." Carol meekly begged him to stop.

"Shane let him go!" Alex wrapped her hands around his raised fist, keeping him from delivering one more blow to the man. "Damn it stop! Stop it!"

The blind rage that had been rushing through his body moments before drained from Shane as Alex struggled to keep him from hitting Ed anymore. Her knuckles were white as sheets while her face was red with blood that flooded beneath the surface of her skin. Her feet dug into the soft mud until her heels were entrenched leaving her toes pointed towards the sun. Shane craned his neck to let his eyes fall upon the stunned face that looked back at him. Alex's eyes were dominated with despondence and hints of anger. Her fingers slightly let up off his skin leaving two sets of perfect imprints on his tanned skin.

"No more," she quietly beseeched him. "Let him go."

Shane felt a stab of chagrin over Alex seeing him like this. He lowered his arm and allowed her to help him to his feet. Ed panted hard as Carol rushed to his side like the obedient wife she was.

"You put your hands on your wife, your girl, or anyone else in this camp one more time and I won't let her stop me."

Alex suddenly felt embarrassed over her old friend's actions. She looked sideways at the others who were now staring at her. Andrea nodded as if to say thanks before they returned to doing laundry. Shane started to turn but in a fit of spite swift kicked the disabled Ed squarely in the chest.

"Shane! What the Hell is wrong with you?" Alex balled her fists tightly on her hips as she glared angrily at the lawman.

Shane said nothing and retreated up the hill leaving Alex standing dazed over the entire situation.

"You okay?" Jacqui came up beside her.

"No," she sadly relented. "Look I don't know what got into him. That's not like him."

"Look you stopped Shane and that took guts. He could've killed Ed," her voice turned softer, "Though the way he treats Carol some of us wouldn't miss his sorry ass."

"I'll attest to that."

"You know I like you Alex."

Alex lightly chuckled as she turned to help with the laundry.

* * *

><p>Shane marched up the hill, angered over Lori's blunt rejection. He had taken care of them, watched them like his own and this was how she was repaying him? By throwing him aside like common trash?<p>

Chris and Austin watched the older man seething as he crossed the camp and climbed atop the RV. Both traded concerned looks as they continued setting up their camp.

"What do you think got into him?"

"I don't know but I think it has something to do with Lori and her boy," Chris had observed Lori storming back with a perturbed expression frozen on her face. Carl had been sulking as he went inside the tent he was sharing with his parents.

* * *

><p>Alex carried up the first load to camp, determined to talk to Shane. The adrenaline had subsided leaving behind a bitter taste in her mouth. She found the makeshift clothesline and started hanging various garments in no particular order. Through the gaps in dripping cotton Alex caught a peek at Shane perched on the RV. His brow was furrowed with troubled concentration as he scanned for Walkers.<p>

Shane took a drink of water then looked down and over at Alex who was draping laundry out. He knew she had been taken aback by his violent attack on Ed but he wasn't in the mood to listen to her rip him a new one. But still, she had snapped him from the blind rage that led his fists against Ed's face and for that a part of him was grateful for it. Shane did admit to himself that the brief moment they shared at the quarry was great. It had been almost like old times again….almost.

A tiny thought began to grow as he wondered what if she had not left for Kansas State and stayed in King County.

_Now is not the time! I need to talk to Lori!_

"Shane," Alex was starting up the ladder. "Can we talk?"

Her voice wasn't harsh or cutting like a dull knife. Instead concern filled every word.

Shane didn't want to talk to her but Alex wasn't going to relent either.

**She's a determined one that Alex! Fear not as Shane won't hurt her! As shown she succeeded in bringing him back to reality at the quarry. I don't think Rick could've stopped him like that when he pummeled Ed. I hope that I did good on this chapter as I tried to incorporate some of the dialogue from the episode. Thanks for the support peeps! :)**


	4. Chapter 4

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

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><p>"Okay start talking."<p>

Alex looked over to Shane with an expectant look.

"What the Hell was that about back there huh? You nearly beat Ed to death."

"He had it coming."

"It's still no excuse to turn the guy's face into hamburger. Back there, down by the water, you scared me."

Alex dropped her head then lifted it back in the direction of Chris and Austin. They were talking to Dale and Jim by the tree.

"I'm sorry," he felt the stab of guilt returning. Alex had always been an astute one even in high school.

"What's going on with you and Lori? I heard your civil little chat."

"Don't worry about it," he gruffly answered.

"Don't worry about it?" She battled back the growing anger in her voice. "When one of my closest friends is being told by a married woman to stay 'the hell' away from her and her son I tend to worry about it!"

"Well stop," Shane pursed his lips together while keeping watch for Walkers.

"No," she shook her head. "You forget who you're talking to."

Alex swung around and rose to her feet, hovering over Shane. Her arms folded tightly across her chest as her eyes narrowed into two tiny slits.

"You screwed her didn't you?"

Shane nearly fell back out of the folding lawn chair at her stark accusation.

"Shane what the hell man? You were sleeping with Lori?"

"You don't understand Alex," he slammed the aluminum frame against the roof of the RV.

"I think I do," she countered in equal fury.

"I thought he was dead!"

Alex was conflicted. She knew Rick had to know what had been going on yet at the same time what if Shane genuinely thought Rick had died in the hospital? Perhaps it started out as simple comfort while grieving the loss of a loved one. But then again they didn't have to sleep together either.

"You know Rick will figure it out eventually."

"So what are you going to tell on me?"

"No."

Shane studied his friend as she sat cross legged on the roof. The battle swirled tumultuously in her rich cerulean eyes. Alex's conscious was nagging at her mind but the friendship and bond she shared with Rick and Shane prevented her from betraying the latter.

"You're my friend Shane and I still care about you, even now, despite this new development. But don't think for a moment I'm doing this to save your ass."

"Oh," his voice dropped. "You're protecting Rick."

"I'm going to let your or Lori tell him about this. He needs to hear it from you. But if I was you," she started to stand, "I would keep clear of Lori. She made it painfully clear at the quarry she wanted nothing to do you."

Alex took two steps when Shane's hand shot out and curled around her wrist.

"Alex wait," he exhaled. "Please don't go."

The hardness in his mocha eyes relented as they pleaded with her to stay. Alex debated if she should stay with him or leave Shane alone to wallow in his self induced misery.

"Alright," she sat back down. Alex and Shane sat in comfortable silence atop the RV but her reprieve was shattered by the screams of the past.

_"The city's being overrun with them!"_

_ "They're gathering at the gate!"_

_ "Fort Riley's been lost!"_

_ "For the love of God someone help us!"_

"Hey Alex you okay?"

"Y-Yeah," she took a deep breath.

"You sure you're okay? You were digging your nails in my wrist," Shane turned his wrist enough to show five half moon marks embedded in his flesh.

"How long until the others get back?" Urgency suddenly filled her voice.

"Depends," Shane wasn't certain. "Why the urgency all of a sudden?"

"Time is against us," she cryptically answered. "I have to get to the CDC."

"Now hold on," Shane interrupted. "You go out there alone and you won't make it to the suburbs!"

"I've been alone for a while now," she snorted.

"What's that supposed to mean? You have Chris, Mike, Ash, and Austin."

Alex said nothing as her thoughts drifted. She had begun to have nightmares after leaving Manhattan; nightmares of steel and sterility that enveloped her in an icy blanket. She had not said anything to the group as it would only compound their troubles which no one needed. Alex closed her eyes and was instantly greeted with the vision.

_"Have you found anything?"_

_ "No."_

_ The connection was crackled as it was weakening with the passing hour._

_ "What do you know?"_

_ "We don't have any cure or vaccine."_

_ "I'm well aware of that Dr. Snow but do you know anything about this?"_

_ "It spreads with a bite from one of the infected. The fever starts in a matter of hours before delirium, vomiting, and intense pain set in; death is painful but swift. Reanimation occurs within hours."_

_ "We lost almost everyone here at the NBAF. I don't know what to do."_

_ Alex rubbed her eyes as fatigue continued to settle in. Panic was creeping in as she was one of the few staff members that remained. The rest were dead or fled when Manhattan was lost._

_ "Have you been successful in reaching Dr. Jenner?"_

_ "We've been in contact but it's been touch and go."_

_ "I'll keep trying from here as well. Don't be deterred Alexandra."_

_ "I'm trying not to but it's kinda hard right now…."_

Alex remembered that day with striking clarity. She and three others were left to man the lab alone. The emergency protocol had been activated, destroying the agents and samples that were still viable. All of the files were saved to a flash drive which now rested in a safe location.

"Hey I'll be back," she was quieter now than when she climbed aboard the RV. Shane found this strange and out of character for Alex. He didn't move but watched with a cautious eye as she started towards her group.

* * *

><p>"Hey Boss," Chris waved as Alex approached.<p>

"Everything set up?"

"Yep," Austin popped his head out from his tent. "Your bags are in your tent."

"Thanks guys," she forced a tiny smile before vanishing behind the flaps.

Alex sat in the center of the narrow cot, looking around at her new home. It had been her home for some time now as time had been something that slid from between her fingers like perfect grains of sand, vanishing behind her like the miles on a road. The creature comforts of running hot water, central air and heat, along with ice cold beer were rarities; luxuries that were once taken for granted like the air each one of them breathed.

She wasn't expecting to see them again but a tiny part of her had held out the hope she would find the guys. Shane had been like his old self when he saw her standing there but that was gone the instant Lori had put her foot down. Alex held no ill will towards Lori but the affair between her and Shane continued to trouble her deeply. Could she lay blame at both their feet or take the easy route and accept the fact each believed Rick was truly dead and were simply reaching out in a time of need?

"You taking visitors?"

Alex lifted her head up to see Shane standing outside the flap. A haphazard expression crossed his face as he waited for her to answer.

"Come on in," she waved him in.

**Ah a dilemma indeed...She wants to tell Rick but she wants Shane to do the right thing...**


	5. Chapter 5

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

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><p>Shane sat down beside her on the cot, feeling slightly ashamed about her witnessing earlier events.<p>

"Look Alex…"

"I'm not going to yell or scream about what happened at the quarry but…."

"But you're pissed."

"Mmm hmm," she nodded. "You're sudden outburst of testosterone fueled rage wouldn't have stemmed from a heated dispute with a certain someone now would it?"

"You always could figure me out," he scratched the back of his neck unsure of what else to say. Alex sat in silence as she thought out her words with caution. She was uncertain of what to expect next from Shane and opted to tread with trepidation.

"There was no way to know he made it was there?"

"His heartbeat was so slow I didn't pick it up and then the military stormed the hospital in gas masks and shooting people. It was like something out of a horror movie almost. So I barricaded his room before I left."

"Wait," she stopped him. "You barricaded his room yet you just said you thought he was dead. So a part of you realized…."

"You're reading too much into it Alex."

"No," she calmly continued, "You are refusing to see the truth Shane. For once will you quit being so damned stubborn about something! Rick is back now; you have to get that through your head. So whatever happened between you and Lori is done in her eyes. If I was you I would respect that boundary."

"So what you're lecturing me now?" Shane bristled.

"I'm trying to get some sense in that thick head of yours Shane Walsh. I could sense the tension between you two before Rick left. This is not the time for a pissing contest okay? Once Rick gets back I'm going to take my people and head up to Atlanta."

"Well what if the CDC is gone? The military was bombing Atlanta at the onset of all this."

"Then I have to go to Fort Detrick, Maryland."

"What's up there?" Shane couldn't but help to ask.

"Fort Detrick is the center of the US biomedical research and medical material management programs for the government along with a few other related facilities. It was home to all research on biological weapons during the Cold War. The USAMRIID is there."

"Okay what's that?"

"The United States Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Diseases, that's what. But you cannot tell Rick or anyone else outside this tent about this. The last thing I need is anyone panicking."

"Why would you say that? Is there something you're not telling me Alex?"

Alex quickly realized her mistake but there was no taking it back now. She could feel Shane's eyes boring into the side of her head, demanding answers from her.

"USAMRIID is my last hope if the CDC fell. So can you see why getting to Atlanta is so important?"

"But what about Fort Benning or one of the other forts?"

"They won't have the facilities," she paused before continuing. "And there's no way to know if Benning is lost. I know Knox, Leonard Wood, and Campbell collapsed but some could still be holding."

"How do you know this?"

"Because we were there," she cryptically answered. Shane watched as she nervously shifted in her spot, distracted by something he couldn't see or hear.

"Alex," Shane started to say but he stopped.

"I've been through literal Hell Shane," she whispered. "I don't know if I can hold it together for them anymore."

"Now you stop talking like that Alex! You are a strong person!"

"Some days I don't feel like it," she shook her head with rejection. "Look I'm sorry for dumping this on you. You have enough to deal with right now."

"Alex," Shane slid closer beside her, "You're not dumping anything on me. You were there for me in high school."

"Yeah but Walkers didn't roam the Earth eating every living thing that crossed their paths either."

Shane could see the toll taken on his friend. It killed him to see Alex in such a decrepit state.

"It's been hard, ya know? The group looks to me and I find myself questioning my abilities to navigate through this shit."

Alex wiped away the tears with the back of her hand.

"Come here," Shane enveloped his arms around her. "Now you listen to me okay? If you weren't a capable leader you wouldn't be here. But you got your group here all the way from Kansas which isn't exactly a day trip."

"I hope they make it back," she sniffled.

"I do too," Shane admitted. Even though Rick was back and resumed his place with his family, Shane prayed his best friend would return.

"Offer still stands for you to come with us Shane."

"I may take you up on that offer too," he answered. Perhaps it would be best for him to go his separate way since nothing was keeping him to Georgia. Their friends and family were either dead or one of the Walkers or their whereabouts were unknown.

"If you need a place to crash," Alex gestured at the spare cot across from hers.

"Thanks," he scratched the back of his neck. "But you don't have to do that Alex."

"Shane," she rubbed her eyes and took a deep breath. "If it was Rick sitting here in your place I would offer the same for him. I've seen your bachelor pad and how can I say this nicely….It's crap."

"Gee thanks."

"I'm serious though," she straightened up. "Get your stuff."

She waited until Shane was out of sight before dragging the heavy duty lock box from under her cot. Alex expertly flipped the latches up and lifted the lid open to reveal the contents within. Glancing up to be sure Shane wasn't returning right away, Alex allowed herself to lighten up before sorting through the Styrofoam cartons and journals. She carefully shifted the cartons around until she spotted the one with the black marking on top.

"Thank god," she exhaled in relief as nothing inside had been affected by the tumultuous trek.

"Hey Alex," Shane called out startling Alex. She nearly let the carton slip from her fingers but reflexes prevented a potential disaster from occurring. Alex scurried to replace everything as it was before snapping the lid shut. Shane pulled the flap aside to find his friend sorting through a military issue duffel bag.

"I think I have to do laundry," she lied.

"Well it's best to go to the quarry in pairs or more," Shane offered.

"It can wait till tomorrow I suppose," she had more than enough clean clothing packed away but Shane was oblivious to this fact. Alex had already slipped up by revealing she knew about Fort Detrick and she couldn't afford another slip of her tongue. The survivors and even her own group was blissfully unaware of what traveled with them and Alex intended to keep it that way until she reached one of her two destinations.

_God help us all if the truth was to get out….._

__**Okay I was not feeling the vibes between Shane and Andrea last week *Bleh*...And in this verse Shane won't be going total psycho but the tensions between him and Rick about Rick's leadership capabilities will be present. Like I said in the beginning: Shane needs someone else! And yes Lori will be interacting with Alex but I don't foresee any fights between them :) Thank you everyone for the alerts and reviews! I hope that everyone reading this story continues to enjoy it! **


	6. Chapter 6

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest…*sighs*

_**A/N: **_I am truly sorry about this overdue update! I hope you all like and feel free to drop a review ;) They always brighten my day up!

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><p>"Is this seat taken?"<p>

Dale hovered over Alex who was sitting in the lawn chair.

"Nope," she shifted her rifle so the older man could sit in the adjacent chair. "What's up Dale?"

"I heard what happened down in the quarry with Ed."

"Yeah," she dropped her voice. "He belted Carol and was ready to do the same to Andrea."

"Well what I wanted to say was thank you for stepping in," Dale's words caught Alex off guard. "I mean…."

"Shane isn't always like that," Alex came to her friend's defense. "Yeah he's a hot head and sometimes acts before thinking. He was that way in high school. But he's a good guy Dale."

"So may I ask you a personal question?"

"Sure," Alex shrugged.

"What's the story with you and those two? When you pulled up those two went pale as sheets."

"We were close in high school. Rick and I got a little closer but it didn't work out."

"I see," Dale noted.

"Anyways," Alex continued, "I took off after graduation to Kansas State and majored in microbiology with a minor in biochemistry. I was working at the NBAF when the outbreak began."

"You have the respect of your team."

"I became leader by default really," Alex shrugged off his compliment.

"Doesn't matter now," Dale shook his head, "I've seen how they look to you."

"We all had to adapt or die," Alex noted unnecessarily. "When I told the group what I did the role of leader was unceremoniously dropped in my lap. I find myself questioning my competency though."

"Why would you say that? You made it here didn't you?"

"But I lost several along the way."

"Well that's the hard part of being a leader Alex: You lose men along the way and in battle. Decisions are made that aren't easy to reach or fathom."

"You sound like one of those battle hardened generals," Alex chuckled.

"I've seen a lot too," Dale rubbed the back of his neck. "I lost my wife to cancer before we could fulfill our dream of seeing the country in this old gal."

"I'm sorry," she placed a hand supportively on his shoulder.

"Thank you," Dale smiled at her condolence. "But Andrea and Amy inadvertently pulled me out of the slump I was in. They're like daughters to me."

"Yeah I see the guys and Ash as like brothers and a sister to me. We're a motley crew that's for sure."

Dale laughed at her description of the group reminding Alex of her father's deep joyous laughter. It nearly brought a tear to her eye as she thought upon the man with nothing but fondness and love.

"I know Shane can be temperamental and shoot from the hip but he's still a friend. And I don't condone what he did to Ed either."

"Well," Dale started then stopped as he noticed Jim in the distance. Alex turned her head to see Dale staring in the distance at a figure hunched over the ground, digging furiously into the Georgia Clay. He had been carrying on with this peculiar activity for some time. Dale began to grow concerned as the day was bordering on hellish as the infamous Georgia humidity had settled in.

"Dale what is it?"

Dale didn't answer right away as he was watching Jim with intensity. Alex adjusted her vision and spotted the tall dark haired man knee deep in a hole of his own creation. Alarmed, she leapt from the ladder and charged towards Jim. Dale was on the younger woman's heels as she approached the silent figure.

"Jim," she was slightly winded from her sprint. "Jim what the Hell are you doing? It's over 100 degrees out here. You'll get heat stroke."

She offered her hand but Jim had tuned both of them out.

"I have to keep digging," he whispered to himself. "I have to keep digging."

"What do you mean keep digging? Why are you digging these holes?"

Alex glanced over her shoulder to Dale who shared similar concerns. He passed the bottle of water over to Alex who waved it a few inches from Jim.

"Hey," she snapped her fingers with the other hand. "Jim you need to stop. Dale and I are worried about you getting heat sickness or worse. Here, take this water and sit by the tree for us."

Alex waited several tense seconds until Jim seemed to take her advice. His arms ceased tearing clay and soil as his head lifted up to meet her anxious gaze. His eyes were weary as they darted between her and Dale before returning towards the earth.

"Damn it," Dale muttered.

"Here," Alex tossed the bottle back before shooting her hands out and grabbing the handle. Jim snapped out of his trance like state and glared angrily at the smaller woman.

"Jim you need to stop this right now. You're going to start scaring everyone!"

Dale watched as her upper torso rippled and tensed beneath the olive green shirt. Splotches of sweat formed in random spots as Alex battled Jim for dominance. Her teeth were gritted and face contorted in determination and pain as her arms and legs burned from the continued standoff.

"Whoa what's going on?"

Shane had caught the scuffle on his way back from the quarry and immediately rushed to Alex's aid. He wrapped his hands around hers giving Alex the advantage. The trio fought for control until finally Jim's hands slipped from the growing perspiration against his palms. He growled in rage as the shovel was forced from his grip and towards the ground. Dale snatched the tool away before Jim could recapture it. Shane twisted his arms behind his back immobilizing the unstable man.

"Damn it Jim," Alex huffed. "We're trying to help you. Why can't you see we're all worried about you?"

"You've been at this for a while now," Dale gently added.

"So what? I'm not hurting anyone!" Jim howled.

"You're hurting yourself," Dale continued. "It's over 100 degrees out here."

"You need to stop this," Shane loosened his hold but only slightly. Jim struggled but the pressure against his back was enough to keep him from breaking free.

"Or what Shane? You'll beat my face in like you did Ed's? I've seen his face and boy did you work him over good; his eye's all swelled up and bruised. I guess that what happens when you cross paths with Shane!"

"Hey now," Alex felt her anger rising. "Ed beat Carol at the quarry. I saw it, Amy saw it, and Jacqui saw it."

"Well he shouldn't have been meddling in other's people's marriages!"

"You know I was taught that when someone was being hit or abused you stop it," Alex snarled. Dale placed a hand on her shoulder soothing some of the bubbling rage beneath.

"And who voted you two king and queen of the group huh?"

"No one," Dale jumped in. "Jim they're only trying to help you. The heat's getting to you can't you see that?"

"Jim please calm down," Alex changed tactics and attempted to reason with him. "Just come sit down and no one will hurt you. We don't want you getting hurt."

"LIAR! That is the biggest lie ever! You're lying Alex!"

Shane caught the pained expression that ran across her face from Jim's stinging accusations. He swore there was a tear that lingered along the woman's eye but once he blinked it was gone. Probably just the sun's tricks.

"Why would I lie to you Jim? I have no reason to deceive you."

"I told my wife and boys that no one would hurt them since this whole thing started! I told them every single day the same thing over and over again! But you know what? It was all one great big lie! One day those damned Walkers came in and ripped them away from me!"

"Oh my god," Alex fell back on the edge of the freshly dug hole, nauseated over Jim's heartbreaking admittance.

"Do you know how I survived? While those, those things were eating my family I escaped!"

Shane spotted the tree and nodded to Dale who reluctantly acquiesced. The cop partially dragged the weeping man towards the massive pine tree. He forced Jim on his bottom while Dale fetched some rope.

"What are you doing Shane?"

"He's a danger to himself and us. Until Jim calms down we can't let him run around like some wild animal. Look you know better than all of us what's out there Alex. You damn well know those things will find us faster if Jim carries on like some savage."

"You're right," she nodded but kept her eyes on the bottom of the shallow pit. "I have seen things that would make the Devil shake with fright. I wouldn't wish this fate upon my worst enemy."

* * *

><p>Dale returned with the rope and water and offered the latter to Jim. To everyone's relief, Jim eagerly accepted the refreshing offering, chugging the icy refreshment as if his very life depended on it. His Adam's apple bobbed rapidly with each gulp for almost a minute before he pulled back and took a breath. Alex breathed in relief as Jim appeared to calm down.<p>

"I'm sorry for scaring you," he looked at her with genuine remorse.

"It was sunstroke," Alex shook it off. "The heat messes with the mind."

"Thank you," his voice like that of a man who had been given absolution for his sins.

* * *

><p>Alex started back for her tent as Dale and Morales took turns watching over Jim. She swept the matted locks off her forehead for the cruel Southern weather refused to offer any winds of relief.<p>

"Alex," Shane called out. Alex stopped and waited for him to catch up. "Hey you okay?"

"Yeah," she shrugged with indifference. "Jim won't bake in the sun now."

"That's not what I meant."

Alex exhaled and crossed her arms knowing what Shane was hinting at. She wasn't exactly in tune with her sensitive side for that died several weeks after the outbreak started.

"I'm fine," she forced out.

"Bullshit," Shane snorted.

"If you think I'm going to divulge or purge my feelings then you're barking up the wrong tree."

She vanished in her tent but Shane refused to give up. He marched inside to see Alex seated on her cot, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. Shane lowered the flap behind him and took a seat alongside her.

"I didn't mean to snap at you," she sniffled.

"It's been Hell on Earth for all of us," he stared at the ground.

"I find myself longing for the time before this happened. When we were in high school and raising Hell in town and giving my poor dad a cardiac every Saturday night."

Alex choked the last two words as the sobs wracked her chest and throat.

"Here," Shane quickly offered comfort with his arms. His hand cupped the back of her head and traced through the chocolate locks. "Just let it all out Alex."

He kissed the top of her head and forehead and rocked back and forth while Alex continued to release the pent up emotion

**I also had a bit of the writer's block for a while but I think I know where we are heading...**


	7. Chapter 7

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

_**A/N: **_Thank you everyone for the alerts and fav adds! I cannot thank all of you enough for this support!

_**A/N: **_I stayed up past my bedtime to finish this so please be kind :)

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><p>The sun was bearing down over the camp. Its merciless kiss scorched the ground and anything unfortunate enough to be caught within the deceitful swath of light as it marched across the sky. What clouds did cross overhead did little to provide any reprieve.<p>

Jim was strangely calm as Dale and Alex approached. He lifted his head and looked through a pair of squinted eyes as Dale uncapped the bottle and rested it gently against his lips allowing for a thin but constant stream to pass into his sickly body. Jim greedily slurped and gulped each and every precious drop, coming close to choking from his hurried swallowing.

"We told the others you weren't feeling well," Alex watched as Jim slightly nodded.

"Said it was heat exhaustion which caused you to lash out like you did," Dale observed for Jim to signal he had enough water. "The last thing we need is for anyone, especially the children or the women, to panic or get upset over this."

Jim tilted his head aside indicating he was good. Dale replaced the cap but made certain it was readily available. The bound man caught the haunted expression that darkened Alex's strong features. He suspected it was from doing damage control over his peculiar behavior but couldn't be certain.

"Thank you," his voice was gravely and raspy but sincere in his gratitude.

"Jim, why were you digging those holes? You can tell us; we won't say a word to anyone else we promise. Isn't that right Dale?"

Alex flashed a cautionary stare in the older man's direction. With the camp on edge and half the group in Atlanta the last thing either one wanted was a full blown panic on their hands. There was no telling what sort of chaos would be unleashed which forced Dale and Alex on edge. Dale scanned over and around but no one had been witness to their little drama.

"Dale," Alex barked snapping the older man from his thoughts.

"Right," he nodded grimly though his eyes didn't match his voice.

"Thank you for not letting anyone get scared," Jim started out. His voice wavered as his breath stayed shallow. "But there I had a reason for it honest."

Something compelled them both to stay and hear the man out.

"Do you remember what it was?" Dale carefully implored.

"Not exactly," Jim heaved, "But I remember it had something to do with a dream I had. The boy, Carl, was in it and so was Rick. Carl was stricken with worry over where Rick was. But I told myself that Rick was a policeman and he was as tough as nails and he would come back from Atlanta with everyone."

"And we're not going to think any differently either," Alex tightly responded. She felt her lungs slowly imploding within themselves and quickly excused herself. Dale didn't get a moment to ask where she was going and watched as Alex charged around the camp and down the path towards the quarry.

Alex wheezed and hacked feeling with each step the air being rung from her chest and throat. Every breath was a literal struggle for precious oxygen. Her body was desperate for every gulp though this attack was mild in comparison to what occurred in Manhattan at the dawn of the Walker outbreak. Then her lungs had been the enemy: A set of flaming spongy tissue that nearly robbed her life by flooding every capillary and space with fluid and blood. The doctors had told her it was acute pneumonia which landed her in the hospital for two weeks. But Alex knew better. Pneumonia patients weren't put under quarantine with 24 hour surveillance and treated like they had Ebola or Anthrax.

She stumbled and fell on her face in the gravel, sensing the burning rising over her cheeks and forehead. Alex looked down at the ground and pounded the rough sharp stones with her fist. Blood coated the small and large stones in uneven blotches of crimson and rose. She lifted a hand which had tiny stones ground into her skin and dabbed gingerly at her lips. The strangled choking that filled her ears blocked out the hollering of Shane as he sped towards her.

"Damn it," she rubbed her fingers in the thick swirl of red and solemnly shook her head. "It's happening again."

"Alex!"

Shane hollered as he trotted down the trail.

"No," she winced and forced her body up and on her feet. Her feet blocked the blood that was drying on the rocks as Shane arrived. His face was dark with concern as his eyes went straight to her mouth then to her face.

"What happened?"

"I-I tripped," she was telling a half truth for Alex did fall but it wasn't the cause of the blood on her lips.

"Here let me look," Shane reached out to examine her lip but was instantly rebuffed by Alex's hand. Shane recoiled as Alex licked her lip leaving behind no trace of any blood.

"N-No I'm fine Shane; honestly it looks worse than what it is. See…"

"Well your face and hands are scratched up," he took her hands in his and examined the pebbles that were still lodged in the rips across her knuckles and tops of her hands. "We should get these cleaned out before they get inflamed or infected."

"I have a first aid kit in the tent," she knew Shane wasn't going to stop fussing over her unless she caved in and let him check her over. He always was protective of her in high school; even when she and Rick had launched their failed attempt at a romantic relationship. But still, Alex couldn't but help to find Shane being cute as he mindfully cleaned each hand, careful not to inflict any further discomfort for her.

* * *

><p>"They look superficial," he took on his cop persona. Alex felt the urge to lean into his touch but refrained. "But the scratches on your face are deeper."<p>

His fingers ghosted across each cheek as the gauze slowly slid down the open scratches, sweeping away the minute pieces of limestone and gravel from exposed skin.

"You know you don't have to do this for me," her protest held no bite.

"Alex," Shane threw the soiled pad aside then continued by applying the ointment. "I know I don't have to but I want to. Now I know you Alexandra and even though you aren't telling me vocally, I can see it in your eyes that you've been through Hell."

"Damn," she snorted but it came out as a light laugh. "You know me too well."

Shane smiled and finished the final dab of cool gel on her injury. Alex swiveled around coming face to face with the lawman.

"Thanks," she gathered his hands into hers. "You can't begin to imagine how great it is seeing you and Rick alive. I was beginning to think everyone I left here didn't make it out alive. I'll be honest we did go back home before finding the camp. I didn't see Leon or Lam anywhere but I saw so many dead just strewn about left to rot in the sun."

"Rick shot Leon because he had been bitten," Shane confessed. "He put a bullet to his head at the sheriff's office."

"No one's safe," Alex lamented. "First chance I get I'm taking my team to Atlanta. We're sitting ducks here."

"Hey now," Shane cut her off. "What's wrong with you? You've been jumpy and acting like a caged opossum ever since you arrived here."

Alex wanted to confide everything she knew but couldn't. It wasn't that she didn't trust Rick or Shane but rather who they were keeping company with. Until she accomplished her mission, her secrets would remain locked away. Failure or worse yet chaos was something she couldn't afford.

"Alex," his hand carded through her windswept locks. "What is it you're not telling me?"

"Nothing you don't already know," she smiled sadly feeling disgusted with herself for holding back from him.

"Alex," he rested his forehead to hers. "Talk to me; please…."

They sat there looking directly into one another's eyes, waiting for the other to flinch first. Shane felt his heart racing being so close to Alex after she had left King County all those years before. Just a few days before he was carrying on with Lori like a carefree teenage couple but now everything had been drastically shifted. Now he was inches from her, close enough to lean in towards her mouth.

Alex was holding her breath, hoping another fit wouldn't interrupt this moment between them. She had found herself thinking about Shane after she left yet had not tried contacting him more often.

"I'm sorry I didn't reach out to you," she admitted. "I should've called or written more often than I did."

"It's alright," he couldn't lie to himself as he had missed the feisty brunette more than he cared to admit. Shane felt himself drawing closer to her until he felt her lips pressing against his. Alex felt him gently push against her before he hastily drew back. Shock penetrated his eyes as he sat frozen beside her.

"I'm sorry, I-I don't know what got into me."

"I think you do," she countered with a playful smile. Her hands slipped up the sides of his face drawing him back to her waiting mouth. Neither one moved for several seconds instead staying relaxed together. Shane nervously opened his mouth like a teenager kissing for the first time. Alex inhaled sighed into his parted lips feeling his arms scooting her over the cot to where he sat.

"Alex!"

Shane and Alex abruptly broke apart with Alex letting Shane hold her face as he gave off the impression he was looking her over. Morales swung the flap back and poked his head in the ten.

"Andrea and Amy fished the quarry dry! We will have all full bellies tonight! My family will not go to bed hungry!"

"Thank you Morales," Shane kept a surprisingly straight face as he turned to cap the ointment and replace it in the first aid kit. He flashed the older man a thankful smile before Morales happily took off. Alex let the brewing laugh loose once he was out of hearing. Shane couldn't but help to chuckle at the near miss they experienced.

"Maybe next time we should wait until the adults have gone to bed," Alex winked. Shane said nothing and instead planted a long meaningful kiss on her.

**One of my readers wanted to know when they would at least K-I-S-S and well I delivered!**


	8. Chapter 8

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

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><p>Alex was relieved not to feel anything stirring in her lungs as she was seated with the rest of the group around the fire. Her chest was silent except for her heart which continued its lone duty of keeping her body alive. After Shane had taken off, Alex jotted down this latest incident in a journal. She was hoping to find a connection, a common link, something that may help predict when the next one would strike.<p>

As they sat around joking and feasting, she decided the fish was some of the best ever to grace her tongue and senses. It had been too long since Alex divulged in such.

"I don't know what you put in this fish Lori but it is simply delish."

Lori smiled at Alex's glowing review as the last few bites vanished from the plate. Jim was seated beside her, grateful to be free from the biting and chafing of the ropes. Shane and Dale had gone and fetched him for he had calmed down since the incident earlier that day. All four agreed not to utter a word about the incident and swore themselves to secrecy. Jim was lighter in his mood and partaking in the campfire laughter and chatter.

"Can I learn to fish?" Carl looked at to his mom.

"Sure," Lori was encouraged by Carl's eagerness. She had feared the reality had destroyed any component of innocence that was left. The new reality would've shattered her mental state if she was at Carl's age.

Alex peeked from the corner of her eye and noticed Shane looking briefly over at Lori then averted his eyes back to the fire. He had not said a word since freeing Jim and joining the rest of the group. Her mood dampened slightly as it remained clear Shane was determined to reach out to Lori despite the crystal clear message she had conveyed. Maybe what happened between them in the tent was just a heat of the moment thing and nothing more. Perhaps their dire situation triggered the human need to feel another for support. At the notion of such Alex swore her heart had dropped in her chest. She bit her lower lip to avert any tears from dropping to the ground.

"You okay?"

Jim caught the grimaced expression on her face.

"Oh uh yeah," she waved his concerns off. "I was just thinking about getting to Atlanta that's all. The group hasn't returned yet so I'm feeling a little anxious about their safety."

"They'll make it back," Carl boldly declared. "My dad's tough."

"Yeah, yeah he is," Alex agreed. Rick was always a pretty tough guy in high school.

"So don't worry Alex."

"Thanks for the pep talk," she smiled across the fire at the kid. Carl surprisingly held a level mature head on his shoulders which inwardly impressed Alex. She carefully scanned the faces surrounding the crackling embers and dancing streaks of yellow and orange while finishing off the last of her fish. The Morales Family had offered a quiet prayer of gratitude for the bounty they were given while Carol and Sophia ate in uneasy silence. Alex knew it was due to Ed possessing the attitude of a two year old brat as he chose to sulk in the tent instead of being with the group.

"I'll be right back," she suddenly excused herself and stalked towards the tent.

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><p>"Open up Ed, we need to talk."<p>

Alex was crouched down waiting for the man to answer. "I'm not leaving until you come out or else I'm coming in. It's your choice."

Several seconds passed before she heard his answer. "I don't answer to no woman."

Alex rolled her eyes and flung the zipper up then ripped the flaps aside. Her eyes were hard as stone while her nostrils flared with anger. She leaned in half way getting a good clear look at the beating he received.

"Too bad Shane didn't belt that big mouth of yours. You think you're such a big bad man don't you Ed? Well do you know what I see when I look at you?"

Ed just coldly stared at Alex as she was getting warmed up.

"I see a bully. An overgrown bully in an adult's body who likes to push women around and threaten them with violence. If Shane didn't do something I would've belted you clear across to the next county. And don't think for a moment that I don't see how you look at your daughter. I saw your feeble attempt to keep her with you before dinner. You may think no one knows but you're wrong."

"Get out," Ed took a swipe at her but Alex easily dodged his attack. His pride wounded as the smaller woman cruelly laughed at him.

"You're a fat, lazy, worthless piece of crap Ed. Instead of owning up to your misdeeds you stay here and pout like a spoiled brat. Oh woe is me! I got put in my place by a cop because I hit my wife! Oh it's not fair!"

Alex mocked the larger man with a snicker as she watched Ed seething before her.

"So just go back to feeling sorry for yourself while everyone else has a good time out there. But just remember someone's always watching."

Alex ducked out then shut the flaps back up before Ed could retaliate against her. As she rose to her feet and turned around, she smacked her face straight into Shane's chest. Before Alex could utter a word Shane was on the dazed woman.

"Talk, now," he curled his hand around her bicep and half dragged her away. Shane waited until they were out of earshot of everyone before speaking. He wasn't thrilled by Alex's little diatribe on Ed.

"Alex what the Hell was that all about? Are you trying to accomplish something stupid?"

"No," she plainly answered, "I was doing something I didn't get to do earlier at the quarry."

"You were provoking him," Shane bluntly accused.

"Uh no," Alex countered. "Provoking is kicking him in the balls and telling him he has a small dick. I was telling him exactly what he was. Did you not see the way he leers at Sophia? I know that look Shane and you damn well know it too. If he tries anything on that little girl, it won't be Ed you'll have to restrain."

Shane read her eyes, aware of the fact Alex would make good on her promise. He couldn't have her shooting off like a loose cannon.

"Alex," Shane gently gripped her shoulders and loudly exhaled in frustration. Sometimes she could push his buttons in all the right places with one look or word.

"Dad was Sheriff and I learned a thing or two off him. My marksmanship skills have improved 100 fold since then."

"Don't do anything to him Alex," Shane pleaded with her.

"Don't plan on it," she was frighteningly calm with her words. "But we can't have Ed falling out of line either. I merely sent a veiled warning to him. He has to know someone is watching."

"Damn it Alex, you don't need to play bad cop okay? In fact you don't need to play cop at all. I don't need your help."

"Whether or not you want to admit it Shane Walsh you do need me. You need me."

Shane pursed his lips as Alex held her ground. She wasn't one to relent which forced the lawman to bite his tongue. The defiant stare bore into his eyes, challenging Shane to do his worst. The equally defiant smile matched her gaze as the rich pools witnessed Shane wavering.

"Fine," he huffed. "But if you do that again I will hog tie you and throw you in Dale's camper."

"You'd have to catch me first," Alex's grin widened as she took two steps towards him. Shane never could say no to her as he felt his body leaning down to meet hers. The instant their lips brushed together they were ripped apart by an inhuman scream.

Alex spotted the Walker first as it broke the darkness and was bathed in the hellish glow of the fire. But soon one was two and two became three and then an entire swarm was converging on the camp. Their grey decaying flesh was frightening against the soft fire as they went for the members of the camp. Chaos swept over everyone as some grabbed bats while others got guns and opened fire on the Walkers. Alex already had her gun in her hand and taking aim at the closest Walkers to her. Blood and brains splattered across the ground as Walker after Walker dropped to the ground. Off in the distance the bulk of the group was under attack as three more were bitten and fell.

One of the Walkers spotted the pair and staggered towards them with a lean feral look in its eye as the heat of their bodies and scent of their vibrant living flesh calling it towards potential prey. The playful light in Alex's eyes had vanished as anger filled the void.

**Now you all know I can't have Shane and Alex just getting together...We still have that nagging issue with Lori...But I have my plans for that to be resolved :)**


	9. Chapter 9

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest…*sighs*

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><p>Alex watched as several Walkers converged on flopping wailing form of Ed. His pathetic wails and shrieks weren't the only cries of desperation and fear ringing in the air. The guttural chokes and grunts of the Walkers were interjected with the ripping and tearing of skin and flesh. Shane jerked Alex towards the camp as nothing could be done to save Ed.<p>

"He's gone Alex!" Alex heard him shouting over the gunfire and shouts. She knew the rest of bullets were in the saddlebag of her bike and had to get to them.

"I need more ammo!"

She started for the bike but a Walker leapt out from behind the truck causing her to trip on a rock and crash into the ground. Alex saw her gun had been ripped from her hand and now resided by the feet of the Walker. Shane spun around to see the thing closing in on her and changed direction in an instant. He ran towards them with shot gun level to the thing's head. Alex pushed her upper body off the soft ground as the Walker pounced like a cougar on a deer.

The shot gun didn't miss. The Walker dropped on top of Alex, forcing her back down on the ground. The cold clammy corpse smothered her smaller body, covering her in blood and guts. Shane tore the Walker off and assisted Alex to her feet. Bits of flesh clung to her hair but that was the least of their worries.

"Help the others," she went for her bag and hastily loaded the gun. Alex spun around and opened fire on several more Walkers, hitting the chests and arms before Daryl appeared and had finished them off with his own firepower.

"Thanks," she nodded shortly before going to help Morales. Shane was ushering the children and women into the RV as Rick and rest charged up the hill. Alex saw the group rushing in and felt a resurgence of energy fill her veins. Rick immediately opened fire on several Walkers, watching them stagger with each hit. Daryl resorted to slamming the butt of his gun into the skulls of the incapacitated Walkers. Morales had taken down two before racing to the safety of the RV.

"Austin!" Alex hollered as a Walker attacked the youngest member of her group. "NO!"

Rick saw the boy go down and engage in a losing battle with the Walker. It was a larger and appeared to have been olive skinned man before succumbing to the illness. Alex sprinted with every bit of energy she held, hearing the wails of her friend as the Walker bit into his throat and shoulder. Rick went after her and watched as Alex started punching the back of the Walker's head with her bare fists. Rage, anger, and hatred pushed her on even as Rick arrived and put a bullet in the side of the Walker's head. Brain matter and blood sprayed Alex's face and arms as it rolled over on its back and stared up with dead hollow eyes. Rick clamped his hand over the gaping wound but blood spurted through his fingers and drenched the soil below. Every breath the boy took in grew weaker and shallower.

Alex growled angrily as her fists continued crushing against the skull of the dead walker, not caring that she had cracked the thick layer of bone and was now pummeling a softening mass. Rick pushed harder against the wound but Austin had gulped his last living breath. He leaned down and closed the dead boy's eyes, granting him that much.

"Damn it," Rick hung his head then sadly shook it before lifting it back up to see Alex continuing unabated in her assault.

"You…Fucking….Bastard!"

Rick caught Alex's wrists feeling the slick limbs slipping in his grip. The wild enraged glint in her eyes made the lawman shudder in unease. Her breathing was labored and shallow as adrenaline pumped in droves, shutting out the pain. The mask of blood painted across her cheeks and forehead made Rick think of one of those tribes in some far away land that painted themselves to look like devils or demons to scare the enemy.

"Alex," Rick snapped and tightened his hold on her. "Alex stop! Stop it! There's nothing we can do."

He watched the tears well in her eyes then slip down her cheeks, creating pinkish streaks in their wake.

"I'm sorry," he softened his stance as Alex slumped over with the sickening reality settling in. Austin was dead but would reanimate if the head wasn't damaged.

"Give me your gun," Alex quietly demanded. Her hand was outstretched and opened expectantly. "I need to do it."

Rick handed the gun over and stepped back giving his friend space. He watched with a heavy heart as Alex pressed the muzzle to the boy's temple then slowly closed her eyes.

_We'll see each other again…..Be with your family….._

Everyone looked up in panic at the sound of the gunfire thinking another Walker attack was occurring. Rick waved his arms up to diffuse the growing unease amongst the others.

"We need to bury him," was all Alex said before returning the gun to Rick. Carl rushed up and embraced his dad, refusing to let go any time soon. Rick knew now was not the time to break the news to Alex. It was clear Austin's death had a deeper impact than Alex was letting on.

* * *

><p>Alex sat in the darkness of her tent, finding she couldn't feel anything anywhere. She had let Austin down, letting that Walker sink its teeth into him.<p>

"I promised I would take care of him! I promised he wouldn't get hurt!"

_Please take Austin with you to Atlanta…._

_ I will…._

_ Tell him I'm sorry….._

_ He already knows….._

_ Watch over my brother for me….._

Her words were excruciating as they seared in her ears, painfully reminding Alex of the promise she made as Austin's sister lay dying in Kentucky. A swarm of Walkers ambushed them outside Fort Campbell and she fell victim. Austin had taken her demise amazingly well, knowing she would no longer be in pain or fear. He had reassured Alex he would be alright and told her not to feel as if she had been the one at fault.

_She trusted you and held no ill will towards you Alex. She knew there was no hope and was happy to be free of this. _

But it didn't matter to Alex. Every casualty endured was a blow to her. Each state they traversed had a member of their group buried in its soil. She opened her hand and looked absently at bloody the pendant below. It had been Austin's. It was a University of Missouri tiger that hung on a silver chain. Each member she lost she had something to remember them by. She slipped the necklace around her neck before rising and rejoining the group. Her movements resembled those of a Walker as her feet shuffled along the ground.

Shane had finished helping Glenn and T-Dog gather the deceased members when Alex entered the light of the fire. He saw the vacant hazy stare and had to do a double take to be sure she was alive. The blood had now dried, caking against her skin. Sophia gasped at the silent woman and ducked away in her mom's arms. Carl was sobbing with Lori comforting her son as Amy lay dead by the RV. A Walker ripped her shoulder and neck apart as she had exited the RV. Ed, or what was left of him, was scattered around the tent with the bulk of his frame halfway out.

But the only thing Alex could see was the body of Austin stretched out by the others. His eyes were shut casting a strangely peaceful state across him. The injuries were unnoticeable from the angle she stood at. It was almost as if he was sleeping and would wake up any minute now.

"I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry I couldn't protect you."

**Angsty...**


	10. Chapter 10

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's…though I wished I owned the rest…*sighs*

**Sorry about the late update...Had a lapse for a while...**

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><p>Alex stayed by Austin's body through the night, refusing to let anyone go near him. She kept her gun in the steady embrace of her hand while the other clutched the dead boy's necklace. No tears were shed for there was no time for such displays of emotion. That would come later when she was alone, in the dark, away from the rest.<p>

"Alex," Shane sat cross legged across from her. "Alex you need to rest."

"No," she tightly answered. "I can't leave him. I promised his sister I would take care of him and I'm going to do just that."

"I can watch him," Dale came up from the RV. "You know I won't let anything happen to him Alex."

"Thanks but I'm staying," she smiled sadly at the older man. Her eyes were hard despite the friendly façade. "He was part of my team; no, wait, he is part of my team. I don't abandon my team."

"Alright," Dale knew it was best not to argue with her. He knew that look for he had seen it in his own eyes. It was at the start of the outbreak when he had lost everything in this world. It was best to let Alex mourn as she desired.

"I'll stay with her," Shane watched as Alex shifted her eyes back to Austin. The tears were brimming at the surface, glistening in the fire. Alex silently willed them back but two broke free and slipped down her face. She had not asked about the fates of the other members of her team but no one was anxious to tell her either. Shane had never seen his old friend like this and it scared him. Not even when she had to put her old Siamese down in high school. At least then Alex had displayed emotion over her loss but as she sat beside the boy, Alex said nothing.

"I know you're hurting," he was careful in his words.

"How would you know what I am?" She kept toying with the stick that she had found by the fire.

"Because I've known you for a long time and I recognize that thousand yard stare."

Alex didn't respond to Shane's observation and stayed focused on the fire. Deep down she knew Austin would be telling her to go on, to head to Atlanta because he was alright and in a better place. But it offered little in the way of solace for her.

"I let him down Shane. I promised his sister on her deathbed I would take care of him!"

"Hey! What happened wasn't your fault Alex! You tried! Austin knows you tried to save him!"

"And he's dead!"

Shane growled in frustration before getting up and pulling Alex to her feet, startling the small woman.

"Now listen to me," he firmly held her by the upper arms. "There was nothing you could do to save him. You have to come to terms with this and move on."

"You know that's real easy for you say!"

"Alex damn it…."

Shane felt her squirming around as she tried wrestling from his hold but he refused to let go. Instead the lawman pulled her against his body and tightened his arms around her. At last the stone wall crumbled in the wake of the rising emotions behind it. Shane felt her sobbing against him as she allowed herself to express the sorrow that had welled up.

"We'll bury him proper," he promised. It was the least they could do. "I'll dig a good deep place for him so no one will bother him."

"Thank you." Her voice was barely above a whisper. Shane looked over at Dale who nodded in agreement. The older man could tell Shane cared a great deal for Alex, judging by the manner he offered to bury the boy. Across the way the others were gathering up the victims of the attacks, digging several sizable areas to place their fallen comrades. Andrea's shrieks and anguished cries carried over the rest as grief held a chokehold over her. Amy had been bitten as she stepped from the RV only to have a second Walker rip at her throat. Carl and Lori were clinging to Rick with the boy sobbing but not for himself but for Amy who now lay dead.

Where laughter once reigned now held a heavy sadness that consumed each one of the survivors.

"Come on," Shane finally urged Alex. "Let's go find a place."

Alex sniffled and wiped her eyes before going with Shane to find a suitable resting place. Glen started dragging the Walkers and creating a heap of corpses; indifferent to the manner in which they were hurled and tossed like trash. Dale quickly rolled up his sleeves and offered a hand to the boy and together they cleared the camp of Walker corpses.

Shane watched patiently as Alex located a quiet spot under the large pine tree. She nodded solemnly at her selection and he started displacing soil and clay. The Georgia soil resisted the upheaval but Shane continued scooping out solid discolored clumps. Alex had put the necklace on and observed how careful her friend was at making things right finding herself being touched by this simple but powerful gesture. Her eyes blurred from the gathering tears and smeared them with her wrist. There would be more tears as everything continued to be absorbed.

"It's perfect," she choked. Shane hopped out and went to retrieve Austin's body. Alex lightly stroked the cool skin before taking a hand and apologizing for her failure.

"I'm sorry I let you down Austin. I failed you in the worst way. I know I can hear you telling me it's alright and you forgive me. I can hear you saying it wasn't my fault and not to be so hard on myself for such. Well I don't think I can grant myself such peace. At least you will no longer know fear, pain, anger, or be alone in this world again. Goodbye Austin; we will see one another again."

Alex released his hand and crossed over his chest. She told herself his suffering was over but nothing in this world would bring him back. He had grown on her like a little brother, looking to her for support and guidance during their long arduous journey. But for him, the journey was over.

Shane carefully lowered the body into the grave then took a step back. Alex took a step forward and collected a mound of clay and soil in her hand. Her fingers worked the dirt apart, sprinkling the blue shirt and jeans. It was times like these she wished she had her friend Jack or Jim. They could silence her hurt even if temporarily. At least she wouldn't feel it.

After several moments of saying her final goodbye, Alex turned to Shane and nodded it was time. He grabbed the shove from against the tree and started the final step of covering the boy. Alex stood at the foot of the grave, watching as each scoop covered skin, denim, and cotton alike until his youthful features had vanished from sight. Shane put the last load of dirt on the hole then smoothed and flattened it out.

"Thank you," she cracked a shaky smile. Shane set the shovel aside and gave his shoulder for Alex to lean on. Her extended family was gone in an instant leaving her alone. "I feel so alone now."

"You're not," Shane countered. "You're not alone."

**I am hoping to be a bit faster in updating...Forgiveness please?**


	11. Chapter 11

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

* * *

><p>Alex didn't sleep as she stayed at Austin's grave despite Shane's reservations about more Walkers appearing.<p>

_If they do come, those undead bastards will get a bullet between their cold soulless eyes!_

So he stayed and kept vigil alongside her through the rest of the night, ever watchful of the woods. Shane watched as her eyes remained deprived of any emotion while they watched the flames contort and twist in ribbons of orange and yellow. It was difficult for him to sit by, unable to do nothing for her aside from being her bodyguard and friend. He wasn't sure if she would react to any offering of solace so he sat still alongside her.

The rest of the camp continued their mournful wake of gathering the bodies. The Walkers outnumbered the survivors which taxed the strength of each able bodied man and woman.

"They should burn," Alex muttered hatefully.

"What?" Shane turned his head towards her.

"They need to burn every last one of those sons of bitches!"

Without warning Alex shot up and marched straight towards Dale's RV. Shane scurried to his feet and raced to catch up as she searched the vehicle and found what she sought.

"What are you doing?"

"Sending them to Hell." Alex's eyes burned with something Shane had never seen before: Cold rage. It made him shiver slightly for all the years he had known her, Alex never displayed the level of fury as she did standing there. The hand clutching the gasoline can curled tighter around the handle forcing vein and tendon alike to swell beneath her skin.

Glen took a step back from the heap as Alex brushed by.

"Alex what are you doing?" Alex stayed tight lipped while popping the cap as she hovered at the edge of the pile. The others stopped what they were doing and watched with curiosity and apprehension as the petite woman casually set the can down and retrieved a pick axe that sat nearby. She tilted her head and narrowed her eyes before unleashing Hell. With a scream that resonated through the air and woods, Alex swung the axe against the bodies, hitting skull, thigh, torso, and rib with indifference. Morales shielded his children's eyes from the gory scene while Lori blocked Carl though he peered around her side. Sophia cried against her mother as the sickening sounds of metal ripping through flesh couldn't be blocked out. She carried on with her grisly task, letting her hatred fuel her body. Her throat grew raw from the shrill high pitched shrieks that she unleashed but Alex didn't care. This macabre show continued for several blood minutes before she stood back and let the handle slip through her hand. Blood, visceral, and flesh clung to the either side of the axe as it slammed into the ground with a heavy thud.

Alex then returned her focus on the can and ripped the cap away. She proceeded and soaked the bodies until the final drop splashed on the heap of decayed flesh and rotted skin. The stench had been drowned by the overpowering fumes causing some to cough and cover their mouths.

"Say hi to the others for me," she lit the Zippo then tossed it in the middle of heap, finding the flames strangely cleansing but comfortless and empty at the same instance. It wasn't going to bring back Austin or any of the others she had lost along the way. It wouldn't turn back the clock to when things were better and brighter. It wouldn't bring her family back.

"I'll be in my tent," she retreated from the growing fire, letting the others take in what closure or comfort they could garner from it.

"Shane," Rick caught his friend alone. "What the Hell was that about?"

After watching Alex's fitting send off of the Walkers, he had spied her face as it was twisted in the same rage Shane had witnessed. What happened to their friend? Where did the girl who would sneak out of her parent's house, party till the sun came up, and slipped in undetected before the rooster could crow?

"She's angry," Shane simply answered. "She lost her family. Alex feels alone."

"But she's not! She has us!"

"I'm aware of that but she doesn't see it that way Rick."

Shane felt bad for snapping at his best friend and quickly backtracked. "Look I'm sorry Rick. I didn't mean to bite. It's just…."

"I get it. You're worried about her."

"Yeah," Shane didn't argue. "I'm gonna try to talk to her."

* * *

><p>Alex felt numb; like someone had ripped the warmth from her body and injected ice into her veins. She wanted to cry for her friend but the tears refused to materialize so instead she sat in the center of the tent, cross legged with a bottle of Jack resting between her legs.<p>

"Alex," Shane called out before stepping in.

"I need to go to Atlanta," she said out of nowhere. Shane could detect a slight slur in her speech.

"No you don't," Shane shook his head. "Not like this you're not."

"And who's gonna stop me? You?"

She took a hearty swig of whiskey then glared at Shane with a nasty stare.

"You're hurting Alex. You're not thinking straight."

"Says the cop who screwed his friend's wife," she retorted. "I heard that conversation you know, down by the quarry."

Shane winced at her stinging words but held his ground. He knew it was the alcohol talking.

"Alex," he dared to reach in and snagged the bottle away from Alex's reach. She snarled and dove for it but fell flat on her stomach and face. "This isn't going to bring him back."

"Don't talk about him like that!"

She staggered to her knees but started shaking before she fell back to the floor of the tent. Shane rolled her over until her back was pressing against his chest. To his surprise, Alex didn't offer up any resistance to his actions. She was eerily silent as the whiskey trekked through her body.

"I know you're hurting and you're angry and you blame yourself for what happened but you have to stop it."

"They're dead you know," Alex drunkenly announced.

"Who's dead?"

"Ash and the others," Alex hiccupped a few sobs. "They didn't come back."

"You don't know that."

"Yes, I do! Yes I do Shane!"

Shane strengthened his resolve and wrapped his arms across her waist. Though Alex didn't say it, she needed him. She had to know she wasn't alone in this world.

"I'm a lousy leader…."

"No, no you're not."

"I'm sorry….I'm sorry for yelling at you….I didn't mean it…I didn't mean to scare anyone..." Remorse set in as the whiskey continued its tumultuous path.

"It's alright Alex. I know you didn't mean any of it and everyone understands."

Shane shifted around until he sat face to face with Alex. He could see the deep distress that settled in her eyes, distress that robbed the beauty from her mocha rings leaving them dull and lifeless. The burden had weighed Alex down but Shane wasn't going to let her slip through his fingers.

"Come on," he hoisted her up to her feet using his body as support. Alex blinked and felt her eyes turn heavy but could see where he was going. "You need rest."

"You're not leaving me are you?"

She pleaded with Shane to stay.

"I didn't plan on it," he slipped behind her and curled up against her back.

"Thanks," she felt his arms wrap back around her offering support and more importantly the feeling of another. Shane could hear her breathing star to level off to deep rhythmic breaths.

"You're not alone Alex," he whispered to himself.

**Can we say drunken rage? A lot of that had been building since the time Alex fled Manhattan which explained the deep seated explosion everyone witnessed...**

**On another note...I am against Shane and Andrea pairing up...Anyone else agree?**


	12. Chapter 12

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's…though I wished I owned the rest…*sighs*

**I am terribly sorry about this late update! But I was totally slammed with writer's wall on this one**

Alex woke up the next day greeted by the stifling humidity that invaded her tent like the plague. She quickly noticed Shane was missing and leapt from the cot and towards others. Daryl and T-Dog were burying the dead with Rick and Shane lending a hand. A short distance away the charred heap of Walkers had been reduced to ash and bone. Guilt trickled into her mind as she slowly hiked towards the camp.

"You guys need help?" She reached down for a shovel and hopped into one of the holes and began digging with the fluidity of a robot. Dirt sailed across the air joined the accumulating mound. Rock, earth, and grass sprinkled the surrounding ground but she didn't pay heed and continued falling deeper into the soil.

"Alex you feeling alright?" Rick jumped down forcing her to stop. Alex simply looked upward and rested her chin atop her hands as she leaned on the shovel.

"I'll manage I suppose," she looked upward to Shane and Daryl who were peering over the edge.

"Look, I heard about what happened. You don't have to go shut down on us."

"You have enough burdens to bare Rick without hurling my woes into the pot. Besides, after we finish here I'm heading to Atlanta."

"Alone? Alex you're not going out there…." Shane instantly protested but the sharp warning look from the set of dark angry rings of mocha made him pause.

"I'm going whether or not anyone else joins me. If you want to head to Fort Benning then go right ahead. But just to let you both know this area isn't safe any longer. Now that the Walkers have attacked it's only a matter of time before more appear."

"No," Rick shook his head and crossed his arms. "We won't let you do it. You are not going out there."

"You two are not my babysitters, not my guardians, and neither one of you are certainly not my father so in reality you have no say in the matter. The conventional rules went out the window the instant this shit hit. And besides, you two can't even agree on where to go next. What does that say to the group?"

"You're one crazy woman you know that?" Daryl suddenly spoke up. "You're going to go out there alone with those things running wild like feral hogs?"

"Well since the Dynamic Duo can't agree on where to go next, I've made my own decision. But if anyone wants go with me the offer stands. I leave after we bury the deceased."

Alex released the shovel watching Rick catch it as it tilted towards him. She hopped up planting her palms on the sturdy soil the hoisted her leg up and on the edge before rolling over and onto the surface. Alex refused to listen to some fucking lecture about her safety when it was the others they should worry about. She started towards the group and came upon Andrea cradling Amy's body in her arms. The older woman continued telling her sister how everything would be alright now and of the regrets that chained her heart all those years she wasn't there for her when she was growing up. Of how proud she was when Amy caught those fish. Of what was and what would never be.

The knife twisted deeper into her back…..

The burden bore deeper onto her shoulders…..

As Alex approached, Amy's body reanimated within Andrea's embrace.

"Shit," she felt the gun in her waistband but Andrea continued talking to Amy as she wheezed and coughed. The once youthful innocence had been void from her eyes as now cloudy rings of dull crimson dominated in its absence. Alex drew her gun training it on the back of Amy's skull. The others had heard the commotion and started to watch with silent affliction as the tragedy reached its mournful climax. Shane and Rick watched as Alex froze but never wavered in her aim. They had lost too many the night before and losing one more would unacceptable.

"I love you," Andrea sobbed and pressed the muzzle to Amy's temple and pulled the trigger. In a matter of seconds it was over. Amy was dead.

Alex replaced her weapon and rushed to Andrea's side.

"Andrea," she knelt down and placed a hand upon her shoulder.

"Leave me alone!" She turned on Alex but the smaller woman didn't budge.

"Can't do that," Alex slowly shook her head. "But let me help you."

Andrea pressed her sister's body against her and soothingly ran a hand up and down her back.

"I lost someone I cared about too last night. I know what it's like to see them slipping from you and how powerless you feel when you can't save them. But we can't let that emptiness win. Amy wouldn't want this for you."

Alex hesitated before continuing. "Look if it would help there's a place next to Austin we can put Amy so that way she won't be alone ever again. Would you like to do that?"

Andrea closed her eyes and rocked back and forth against the ground. Alex waited patiently until she looked up and nodded her head.

"Yes," she sniffled.

"Take your time," Alex smiled and hugged her. "When you're ready let me know."

"Thank you," Andrea whispered gratefully.

Alex gave Andrea a spare sheet for her to cover Amy in before lowering her into the ground. The mermaid necklace was clasped around her neck as it was Amy's birthday today. As Daryl and T-Dog started covering the white sheet, Alex uttered a final passage for their deceased:

_What reside here in the cold dead earth are not the souls but merely the bodies of the fallen._

_ Their souls have sought passage and the embrace of Charon as he ferries them towards the Elysian Fields where pain and suffering are not welcomed. _

_ There they shall be reunited with the souls of the ancestors and warriors of the past and where they will await with open arms to embrace us as well. _

She turned and brushed past T-Dog and Daryl and towards her camp.

"Hey Alex," T-Dog caught up to her. "You can't be serious? Going out there alone?"

Alex sadly smiled at her new friend as he stood there. "There's something I have to do and it takes me to Atlanta."

"It's suicide back there! You didn't see what happened."

"T-Dog, I have seen things with my own eyes that if I was to tell you it would question your sanity and push you to the brink."

T-Dog wasn't sure what to make of her cryptic talk. What was she hiding? Why was she so hell bent on going back into the hot zone?

"Watch Shane and Rick for me? Those two are gonna need all the support they can get."

As Alex started to turn and walk towards her truck the sudden shouting over by the RV made her halt and spin around.

_"Jim's been bitten!"_

Jacqui had ripped Jim's shirt up to show the two rows of crescent moons that had been torn into his side. Suddenly Alex's plan hit a nasty road block.

"Damn it," she muttered and started towards the others.

**PS - I created that little eulogy and stuck with Greek/Roman mythology references ;) For those of you who may not know this: Charon was the ferryman who took the souls of the dead to the underworld via the River Styx. The Elysian Fields are what the Romans considered their version of the afterlife. it was where the Roman soldiers hoped to be if they died in battle. **


	13. Chapter 13

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but my OC's….though I wished I owned the rest….*sighs*

**I am sooooo sorry about this late delay! With the purge FF is doing I have been in Defcon 1 (Meaning I am uploading on AFF and will get on Deviant art uploading stories there too) and work and RL shot the Muse in the butt...**

Jacqui moved aside allowing Alex the chance to examine Jim. As she lifted up the shredded side of the white shirt the truth glared back in the form of deep crimson welts; a twisted parting gift from one of the now charred Walkers.

"Shit," she slapped a hand on her forehead. Time had become their enemy.

"I say we kill him! We put a pick axe through his head right now!"

Daryl marched towards the infected man with weapon clutched in his hands. The menacing look cast across the man's face made Rick leap in front of him.

"What are you doing?"

"He's gonna turn and become just like the others," Daryl pointed the top of the axe straight at Jim's head. He started to take a swing but the cocking of Rick's gun made him stop cold.

"We don't kill the living," Rick bluntly declared. Alex watched as the tension simmered between the two men with Shane watching on from behind. She knew the group was wasting precious minutes of daylight standing here but Daryl had a point: Jim was going to turn.

"Just leave me here," Jim coughed weakly.

"No," Rick adamantly shook his head. "We don't leave anyone behind."

Alex had to take a walk. Her anger was rising over Rick's blindness. There was no cure or even at the very least a treatment!

"Alex," Shane caught her upper bicep. "Wait up."

"Rick's not getting it," she exasperated. "Jim's fate has been sealed. The most humane thing we can do is end his suffering."

"And I agree with you."

"He won't make it to Atlanta."

Shane raised an eyebrow in her direction. "Oh damn it Alex not you too…."

She shot up a hand silencing the deputy. "Look, if we were closer to Atlanta I wouldn't be as concerned but I've seen what this thing does to its victims. Their suffering is unimaginable if they don't die right away. I've seen enough agony and damnation that another hurting face is one face too many for me."

"Alex what are you saying?"

"Damn it," she cursed herself for saying too much. "I've said enough Shane. I don't want to panic anyone."

"Alexandra," he snapped harder than he wanted to. "I've seen those cases in your tent. What is going on? What is it you're hiding?"

His voice tapered off from a harsh manner to a softer concerned tone. The vice grip lightened up on her arm creating a perfect imprint of his fingers ringing around her bicep.

"When I was at NBAF we were researching treatments and maybe a cure or vaccine for this thing."

"You were working with this shit?"

"Yeah," she sighed. "When the first cases materialized we were assisting USAMRIID and the CDC in fighting this. We were a satellite facility because we were away from the epidemic…..Until it reached Kansas that is."

"Why didn't you tell me? Or tell Rick?" Shane felt wounded by her secrecy and willingness to keep them in the dark especially regarding something of this nature. Did she not trust them?

"Because number one, I don't want people to freak out. You saw everyone's reaction to Jim being bitten. Imagine that group mentality amplified 100 times if even one of them learned what I was doing. Number two, I didn't want to raise any false hopes. And besides, it's a bad idea to let too many people know what I'm doing. I can't risk the chance of anything being compromised. You know….Chain of command?"

"What's that supposed to mean? Alex in case you didn't see, chain of command was thrown out the window once the world went to shit."

"Look I've said too much Shane," Alex waved her hands around and started back towards her tent. Shane trailed her refusing to let Alex keep the shroud of secrecy up and around her.

"Damn it Shane," Alex halted at the flap entrance with one hand curled around the corner.

"Alex," Shane growled and ushered her in. "What is going on? And I am not leaving until you tell me just what it is you're doing with those."

His gloved hand floundered and wavered to the two cases nestled under her cot.

"You wanna know?"

"Yes!"

"Fine," Alex huffed. "But close the flap first."

Shane quickly closed the retracted flap down over the opening as Alex tugged the first case out from its resting place. She was cross legged with her knees pressed against the smooth olive surface. Alex was starting to regret keeping this whole thing from Shane as she had underestimated his stubbornness the second she arrived at the quarry. But so much had been altered, so much ripped apart so quickly and so suddenly. It had been difficult to grant even an inch of trust to anyone as Western Civilization had disintegrated much like the Roman Empire; only the Romans didn't have Walkers breathing down their necks.

She felt Shane's shins pushing behind her as he cautiously peered down and over her shoulder.

"Relax," she glanced over her right shoulder. "Everything in here is sealed so nothing will escape."

"E-Escape?" He strangled out a choking response.

"I took the standard precautions for transporting certain…..materials but also a few failsafe measures."

The latches snapped up in sync allowing the heavy lid to be elevated and reveal its secrets to another. Shane knelt down beside her and gingerly plucked the tube in the bottom left corner. The thick glass was encapsulated with a solid rubber cork followed by a layer of chemical tape which was proceeded by a layer of biohazard tape. The bright red glared back at Shane, triggering a brief flash of the hospital massacre.

_Blood sprayed the walls, painting the cheap pastel paintings of flowers and trees with thick showers of crimson. Random patterns splattered the walls and doors as the staff had been cruelly rounded up like cattle then executed like common criminals. _

"Shane," Alex caught the slight panic on drawn on his face as the blood had drained like water from a tub. "Shane what is it?"

"Nothing," he shook it off. "What is this stuff?"

"Samples," she cryptically responded. "The last of what I could rescue before NBAF self destructed taking about an area the size of Mayberry. That sample in your hand is brain fluid from a victim of whatever it is."

"Is this why you're so anxious to go to Atlanta?"

"Yeah," she closed her eyes and nodded her head. "So can you understand why no one else can know about this?"

Shane replaced the vial, mindful of the pressure he applied against the glass.

"You're right," he agreed. "No one can know about this. But you do realize what will happen if Rick was to find out about this."

"Rick's not going to find out about this now is he?" Her voice hardened warning Shane. Her back stayed turned as the metal locks clicked down protecting the precious cargo.

"No," Shane wasn't going to let Rick know about this.

"Good," Alex breathed in but as she exhaled it hitched and twisted into a deep lung wrenching cough.

_Oh shit not again…._

"Alex," Shane was beside her in an instant as she fell under the spell of the violent fit. Her tongue was bathed in the thick sheen of iron and tin then spread to her teeth and lips. She could tell him how her chest tightened then burned like someone had doused gasoline down her throat then lit a match. The very air she needed was soaked in the blood that flooded her throat and mouth. Her body started convulsing on the tent floor as her eyes rolled up in the back of her head. Blood spilled in saliva slick threads, coating Shane's pants and shirt.

"Oh my god," Shane snatched the closest thing he could find, a dirty shirt, and cupped it against Alex's chin. "Alex, look at me."

He knew not to stick anything in her mouth as she could break her teeth if this was a seizure. Instead he rolled her on her side letting the blood drain from her passageway. The stench of bile and blood sickened the deputy but he refused to abandon Alex as she twitched and spasm beside him. Her knees banged with the force of a brick against his thighs but Shane ignored the sharp punches of bone into his muscles.

Seconds melted into hours in Shane's mind as he kept Alex stable. She had gotten ill before at the quarry but didn't tell her he had seen it. He should've asked her about it as she continued to struggle and regain control of her bodily functions.

Alex felt her world darken as Shane's panic stricken voice faded; it was as though he was in a tunnel and the tunnel was growing longer with every syllable spoken. Her body was growing weaker as the convulsions ripped through her already debilitated body. This was the worst episode yet. She thought she was going to die in Paducah but now perhaps she was going to die here.

_Oh shit she's going!_

_ Get the damn paddles!_

_ Clear!_

_ The whine of the paddles was silenced by the thump of her still body against the cold solid steel. _

_ Again! Clear!_

_ The doctor pressed the paddles against the naked chest and screamed, "Clear!"_

_ Energy shocked her body, regenerating the dying cells with a new surge in vibrancy. _

_ We have a pulse!_

_ Alex….Alex! _

Alex forced the sticky lids open and slowly tilted her head towards the source of her name being called out.

"Alex thank God!" Shane was bent over her as she was sprawled on the cot. His eyes were damp with tears which peppered the stiff splotches of red that ruined the soft olive cotton. "I thought I lost you…"

_I thought I lost me too….._

"Hey…." She croaked. "I'm going to be okay."

"No," he shook his head. "What the Hell happened to you? Your body was flailing and your eyes were rolled up in your head….."

_I'm going to have to tell him…..How is he going to react?_

_ Will he panic? Or will he understand?_

"Shane," Alex lifted her hand off the metal frame, finding it was like lifting a 100 pound barbell. Shane caught her hand and pressed it in his.

"Shhhh," he shushed her. "You need to rest."

Shane felt the churning in his stomach as he cleaned Alex up and let her sleep. Instinct kicked in and he searched her body for bites but her skin remained unbroken. She wasn't infected as it took a bite to infect a person. Was she sick? Did she develop some disease or ailment? God what was happening to her?

**Uh oh...Shane is going to learn one of Alex's secrets...But how and when? **


	14. Chapter 14

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but Alex and the other OC's…..But damn it if I didn't wish I owned the others!

**So I know it's been TOO long since this was updated! But with the Muse reading season 3 spoilers the gears are grinding (We don't have AMC….Cable cut by soon to be ex). I already have an idea of what is going to happen in this verse now that the Governor makes his grand entrance. Honestly I think their choice is eerily well done. I know he's part Hispanic in the graphic novels but for some reason David Morrissey fits. **

**I will say this: Shane will go darker and it is because of what will happen to Alex. Okay enough blabbing and onto the good stuff!**

* * *

><p>"Thanks for not panicking."<p>

Alex forced a weary smile revealing splashes of pink and tan across her teeth. She could still taste the iron and copper bits along the palate of her tongue no matter how many times she had spat and chased it down with Jack. But then again not even the strongest alcohol could kill enough brain cells to silence the memories.

"Alex what in the Hell is going on with you? You're coughing up blood and dropping over like a lame steer then turn around pretending to be alright."

"I'm not turning into a Walker if that's what you're afraid of."

"Well that's reassuring. Do you realize you could've been seen at the quarry?"

"Wait you saw me? You saw me….." The blood drained from her face like water racing into the bottom of a sink.

"Yeah," Shane ran his hands through his hair with frustration. "I saw you and saw how you got rid of the evidence."

"I didn't want anyone to see. Like I said before everyone's in a state of shock and panic and this is the last thing they need to see right now. Knowing that crazed Redneck Daryl he would want to lop my head off first then ask questions later. Hell he's further up the ladder of crazy than you at this point."

Shane raised an eyebrow towards Alex who swung her head back taking another swirl of whiskey. The taste was finally breaking apart.

"Finally," she muttered in relief.

"So you're dragging around brain chunks in tubes, coughing up blood and God knows what else! Is there anything else you would like to share with me? If I lift the trunk up will I find a damned Walker?!"

She didn't respond vocally and offered the bottle up to Shane who accepted the remaining contents.

"No," her answer was flat. "You already know what I carry and why I'm keeping it hidden; even from Rick. Rick's too honest not to keep quiet about it. He's a great friend but this is for everyone's safety. But you Shane….."

She looked up casting a devious grin. "You can keep a secret or two. Remember in high school when I was 'sick'?"

"Oh yeah! That was so you could sneak off and drive down to Savannah because the Stones were touring?"

"It was well worth the risk! And besides you were a great coconspirator." Alex grinned wider but quickly dropped the smile. "But seriously, you can stay quiet which is why you're here. But first, you need to hear something and you won't like it."

"Okay what?" Shane shifted uncomfortably in his spot.

"Back off Lori okay? Right now the last thing we need is for Hell to be unleashed even further because you have a hard on for a married woman. If I am going to confide in you Shane you need to stay focused. Let Rick worry about her. He's back now."

His face darkened at her words but Alex's face was on par with his hardened stare. Shane knew she was right: He didn't want to hear it.

"You know I'm right Shane and deep down you know it too. So sit down and swallow that pride of yours would ya?"

Alex leaned against the frame of the cot, shifting to let her spine roll around the curvature of the rail. Her fingers rapped against her kneecap as Shane hovered in the center of the shelter. They carried on with their staring contest, neither one flinching. Seconds marched into minutes but neither one was backing down. Shane narrowed his eyes slightly, hardening the edges of his eyes at Alex. It was then she understood what needed to be done.

"Fine, be that way Shane," she shook her head with a sad smile. "Because I have no time for your childish antics. I have a mission to accomplish and I am not going to let a man with the mentality of a five year old hinder that."

Alex shifted around onto her knees and dragged the case from its hiding place.

"What are you doing?"

"Packing up," she answered in a causal tone like a teen announcing they were going out.

"The Hell you are!" Shane started to protest but Alex spun around pressing her nose to his nose. Her eyes were dangerously narrow as if they were two icy daggers stabbing him. Something had changed in Alex. Shane didn't have to say it; he could sense it.

"Well I can't get through that thick skull of yours Shane so I decided it's time to move on. I'll leave when everyone's asleep. No need to create a scene in front of the group."

She backed down, returning to packing her possessions. Shane fisted his hands through his hair in frustration.

"Damn it Alexandra! Why do insist on being so stubborn like a mule!?"

"I'm the one being stubborn?" She was taken aback by his accusation. "You are one to talk Shane Walsh! If looks could kill Rick would've been dead the second he set foot in this camp! And don't even attempt to lie about it. I wasn't the only one to see it."

Alex jerked around only to have Shane pull her right back around.

"Let me go Shane. I have to pack." Her voice dropped to a cold warning tone.

"No," Shane curled his fingers tighter around her bicep. "I am not going to let you leave."

"Why should you care?" She shook her head. "You're more worried about what Lori's doing. Hell, I'm probably just a rebound for you."

"R-rebound!" Shane sputtered the word.

"Yeah, you know; that person who gets used so the other one can feel better about themselves! I'm your rebound Shane."

Shane heard her voice crack as she talked down about herself. "How can I…."

"How can you what Alex?"

"Nothing," she shook her head. "You don't care. I can see it in the way you look at her. But I can see she doesn't care. I wasn't the only rebound in this camp."

Alex cast a content look before returning to her task. Shane just stood there, stunned at her harsh words. He watched as she locked and double checked each case before replacing them under the cot. Her duffel was packed tight as was the shoulder case that nestled alongside it. The confined space was growing hot and thick with the increasing tension. Alex wasn't about to admit she was hurting over Shane's continued lusting for Lori.

"So if you're going to continue eye fucking her every chance you can get then please leave. I have no time for testosterone fueled rages or fits."

"Alex," Shane groaned. "Wait, wait a minute."

"You have 60 seconds starting now," she bluntly responded without turning her back.

"I'm sorry alright? You have no idea what it's like."

"45 seconds," Alex's voice was void of empathy. "Clock's ticking Shane."

"I thought Rick was dead!"

"40 seconds."

"Alright I admit I've liked Lori! But I respected Rick and kept my distance!"

"So you just figured you could swoop right in and pick up the pieces. Is that it? And by the way you have 30 seconds."

Alex flashed her back to Shane but didn't resume her packing. Shane watched as her shoulders dropped and head dipped between them.

"Why…." She sighed heavily.

"Why what Alex?" Shane stretched his arm out with hand lowering over her shoulder.

"Why is it I go for the ones who always seem out of touch? You didn't see it; back in high school did you?"

Alex dropped on the cot with a shirt intertwined within her fingers. Shane had been a cop long enough to be able to read people. The solemn mask that she wore told him what he had been so stupid and ignorant to miss.

"You….." His voice croaked as his stomach twisted into tight knots.

"You never caught on. Rick knew it which was why it didn't work out between us then. He knew I liked you."

"Ah geez," Shane ran one of his hands over his face then paused just below his nose. Had he been so crazed and balls deep in his conquests that he had been oblivious to what had been standing right before him?

"I thought maybe you would snap out of it and take notice of me. But then I got the free ride to Manhattan and you didn't do or say anything. And right now it feels like it's happening all over again."

"Alex I'm sorry."

"Such as life I suppose," she snorted with bitterness. Shane growled at her indifference. But she deserved to harbor such sentiments. He had brushed her off, taking advantage of her friendship instead of stopping and listening. "So go, do what you want."

And with that Alex had dismissed him. The lawman couldn't see the shower of tears washing down her face. Why? Why did she have to feel this way? After fleeing Kansas and picking up survivors she felt alone despite the companionship and support from the group. Yes even in this new existence, Alex couldn't shake him and began to wonder if it wouldn't cloud her mind and push towards insanity.

"Alex," the sudden grappling of strong arms across her waist startled her from her musings. Shane molded his body to hers, resting his chin on her shoulder.

"What is it Shane?" Her voice came out angrier than she wanted. He winced at her words but continued holding on, tightening his firm but affectionate grip on her.

"You left. I didn't know you felt like that. I didn't see…."

"No you didn't see it," she shook her.

"But now I do; so please just stay."

"And what if you decide to let your dick do the thinking and go wandering? How do I know that you won't let those feelings or whatever you wish to call them creep back up and take over?"

"You will have to trust me please…."

Alex heard the shift in his tone, going from irritated to pleading. She wanted to believe him but it was increasingly difficult to vest her faith in him. His concerns and feelings for Lori were evident.

"Why should I take your word for it Shane? I saw how you looked at her even after…."

The kiss they shared the days before tasted sour in her mouth now before curdling her tongue and lips.

"What do I have to do Alex?"

"Let her go Shane," Alex was blunt. Shane knew she was right. He couldn't grasp straws or cling to what had been. If he truly cared for Alex as he told himself he did, Lori wouldn't be nagging in his mind. One arm climbed up and crossed the front of her chest with hand resting on the opposite shoulder.

"That is the only way I am going to stay with you and the group."

Her words ended with finality and not an inch for Shane to argue back. Shane was at the crossroads facing consequences with the wrong choice. His decision had better be the right damn one.

"Have you decided?"

"Stay."

"Alright," she shut her eyes and leaned back against him. "I won't leave. But please don't make me regret my decision."

Shane knew what she meant: Fuck me over and you'll never hear from or see me again. When she had become upset just moments before he had felt it; the burning blade that pierced him in the chest, twisting and tightening with each hurtful word but Shane knew it was warranted. He deserved it.

"But why did you cough blood? Please Alex just tell me what's going on."

_"Shit she's crashing out!"_

_ The blinding lights overhead forced her eyes shut. The light weight of the oxygen mask felt like a wet rag that covered her mouth and nose, absorbing the thick spray of crimson on the inside. Voices faded in and out like a bad radio signal with the frantic shuffling and thundering of feet static in the background. _

_ "Get her stabilized now DAMN IT!"_

_ The tearing of her vein as the needle pierced an opening didn't register to the semi conscious woman on the stretcher. _

_ "The bleeding's not slowing!"_

_ "Alright then get IT!"_

_ The male voice barked hard followed by the slamming of metal off to the right. _

_ "CODE BLUE!"_

"I was very very ill before the world went to Hell. I worked at the National Bio and Agro-Defense Facility outside of Kansas State. I had Level 4 access meaning I worked with viruses and bacteria so deadly and dangerous that no cure treatment or a vaccine exists."

Alex broke away from his warm circle and sat on the edge of the bed.

"My clearance was classified. I answered to Homeland Security; the branch the government didn't want the public to know about."

"Jesus Alex….."

"I know what it looks like Shane but my expertise was in developing cures and vaccines, not create whatever the fuck turned the world into…..Hell I don't know what to call it anymore."

"Wait," Shane caught the slip. "You know what that is?"

"No I don't. If I did I wouldn't be here talking to you or have these cases full of brain pieces now would I? I lost contact with Dr. Jenner at the CDC and I was instructed to find him."

"What do you mean by 'instructed'?" Shane eyed the cases then shifted his anxious gaze to her.

"Fort Detrick, Maryland," she slapped her hands on top of her thighs. "If Manhattan and Atlanta fell then Detrick was the fail safe. But I lost touch with them right after I lost contact with Jenner."

"Damn it Alex what the fuck did you get yourself into?" Shane exhaled.

"I wanted to do what's right. I wanted to save lives. You have no idea what the HELL goes on or went on. I knew what was going on in places like Russia and Syria. Did you know Homeland Security had tabs on 25 scientists from the Old Soviet Block? They were in talks to sell off the stockpiles of Variola to known terrorist groups! Do you know what Variola is Shane?"

"No," science had not been his strong suit in high school.

"It….Is….Smallpox! The same fucking disease that wiped out whole tribes in the New World. Don't you understand Shane? I'm not the enemy. If we can find a treatment or vaccine or hell a cure, we can turn the tide. We won't have to stay on the run."

The glimmer of hope in her sapphire eyes made Shane stop to pause. What if they could find a way to stem this thing? What if the CDC could do it?

Slender warm hands wrapped around his as Alex started shaking.

"Hey," he saw her trembling beside him. "Hey it's alright."

"I'm sorry if I didn't tell you sooner but understand. I wanted to tell you sooner but with the Walkers and Austin, it was the least of my problems."

"You're telling me now."

"I know and I think that it's best for everyone to keep it between you and me."

"Thanks," she let out a small breath of relief. They sat in comfortable silence, the first since entering her tent. Alex wanted to fall asleep right then and there but gravel and dry Georgia grass being snapped and crunched prevented her from doing so.

"Shane, Alex," Dale poked his head through the flaps. "The Morales Family's decided to leave."

"What?" Alex jumped up. "Why?"

"Morales has family in Birmingham and he thinks they can find them out there."

"He's nuts! Especially with his kids."

"We tried talking him out of it but he and his wife are adamant about going."

Suddenly, Alex got an idea.

"Tell them to wait a minute. I wanted to give them something."

Dale and Shane traded a perplexed expression as she raced out the tent, kicking up gravel and rock behind her.

"Now what's gotten into her?" The older man itched his head.

* * *

><p>"Mr. Morales," Alex didn't break a sweat despite the Georgia heat. The patriarch shut the door and looked at the woman rapidly approaching.<p>

"Senorita Alex," he greeted her. "You cannot talk us out of going."

"I know but I wanted to give you something before you go."

Morales raised an eyebrow as she reached into her pocket and launched a set of keys his way. He caught the steel loop with two keys dangling off it. He stared at the offering like it was something foreign to him.

"I-I do not understand," he shook his head.

"That car," she pointed at the Fusion, "is yours. I have my truck and it would be left here. Take it. If you see your family you'll be able to stay together."

"Mio dios," he crossed himself and uttered a short thank you in Spanish. "Gracias Senorita Alex!"

Alex wasn't prepared for the bear hug Morales rewarded her with. She awkwardly patted his back while trying to breathe. His wife was in a state of shock over the generousness of the stranger.

"There's a gun in the glove box and one under the driver's seat," she whispered. "Ammunition is in the console."

"Gracias," he grew teary eyed at the additional blessing.

"Now remember, stay away from the cities," Rick advised. The smaller towns would be safer bets as the populations were either dead or gone with pockets of infected.

"Thank you everyone," the Hispanic man was beyond grateful.

"Be safe," Rick extended his hand to which Morales collapsed his in a vise of bone and skin.

"God bless Senor Rick," he smiled through the tears as he hitched the car up to the back of his vehicle. Shane came up behind Alex in time to see the family depart. The survivors waved their final goodbyes as the small caravan slipped into the horizon. Everyone in the group just stared at Alex as she suddenly felt as if she was on trial.

"We have enough transportation," she defended her actions.

"Alex we're not questioning your actions," Dale stepped forward. "What you did was nothing short of selfless."

"They have a long road before them. They will need all the advantages they can get; just like us."

Alex was cryptic in her words.

"I suppose I will retire. I mean we are heading into Atlanta."

"You're staying?" Rick couldn't but help to be elated.

"Yeah I am," she nodded. "It took some convincing," she paused and looked at Shane then back to Rick, "But I'm staying on the road with the circus."


	15. Chapter 15

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but Alex and her gang (Though Shane will argue otherwise)

**I apologize for this loooooooong delay in updating! Way too much BS in RL and major wall on this story. Forgiveness please!?**

"I can't believe it," Daryl snarled as Glen blocked him from dragging one of the dead to the roaring bonfire. How much more was this little China man going to piss him off?! As if leaving his brother behind in Atlanta wasn't enough! Now this little bastard was demanding he NOT put the bodies of the dead in the growing pyre?!

"We don't burn them! We bury them! We bury our people! The fire's for Geeks!"

"This is fucking stupid! You're gonna reap what you sow! You left Merle behind back here on that roof! You left my brother up there ALONE! Fucking handcuffed to a pipe!"

"HEY!" Alex charged up the road with Shane hot on her heels. Her anger was rapidly superseding her reasoning and the source of her rapidly burning rage was standing to her immediate left. "What the HELL is going on?!"

Daryl ignored her though he glared sharp daggers at the new arrival but Glen began hollering at the top of his lungs. "HE WANTS TO BURN THEM! H-H-HE…."

"Glen breathe for me okay?" Her hands dropped on his shaky shoulders. Alex was battling the urge to light up Daryl but it was losing ground. "You need to take a deep breath."

His eyes shot straight at Daryl who was panting hard and angrily with eyes stabbing back with equivalent ferocity. He caught the defined jaw clenching hard with the narrow nostrils flaring. If Shane wasn't there watching her like a damn hawk…..

"Let's just calm down. We are ALL hurting right now! I lost someone like everyone else here Daryl. I don't know what happened in Atlanta with your brother but-"

"Jim's been bitten!" Jacqui charged up to the group announcing their latest disaster.

"So much for that," Alex groaned as everyone else stood with mouths hanging open. Daryl went straight for the pick axe wasting no time in putting the man out of his misery. After all, they left his brother on top of that building. Jim snatched the shovel, poised to defend himself. T-Dog sneaked up behind him, grappling his arms around the man's elbows which allowed for Rick to confiscate the makeshift weapon.

"I-I'm okay," Jim didn't fool anyone with his feeble attempts to convince them; especially Daryl. "I-I'm okay."

Daryl ripped the shirt up showing off the distinctly fresh rows of punctured skin and flesh. Everyone froze, distancing themselves from the poor soul; everyone but Alex.

"I say we take a pick axe to his head!" Daryl voiced what the others were thinking. His arms swung the weapon around, eager to stop another from rising. "The line's pretty damn clear: Zero tolerance for Walkers! One shot and it's done."

"HEY!" Alex lunged for Daryl who was focused on Jim. Dirt kicked up under then behind her boots creating a small storm of rock and sand in her wake.

Shane immediately went for Alex, restraining her but struggling as she thrashed violently in his embrace. Rick instantly put his body between Jim and Daryl, preventing another death from playing out. His revolver was instantly trained to the younger man's head with the hammer pulled back demonstrating the depths of his seriousness. Alex felt her heart stop and ceased her fight. Was Rick going to pull the trigger?! Didn't he just moments before state they didn't kill the living!? Were they about to embark on that dangerous slope!?

"Rick…." Shane released Alex going to his friend's side. Tension boiled like water in a kettle as the three men stood off. Daryl with the axe and Rick with the revolver that continued to stay trained on the former's head. "Rick I agree with you; Alex agrees with you. Just put the gun down."

Daryl raised his arms higher as though he was preparing to strike one of the lawmen. The apprehension in Rick's eyes alerted Shane to the danger behind him. As he spun around in preparation to defend his best friend, Rick kept the gun directed at Daryl, determined to regain control of what could be a rapidly deteriorating situation.

"We don't kill the living."

"That's funny coming from a man who just held a gun to my head."

"We may disagree on things but not this. Put the pick axe down Daryl." Shane was quiet but firm in his demand. Beneath the sheriff's cap his eyes hardened at the man. His posture was relaxed but could shift at the drop of a hat. Being in law enforcement had taught both men how to appear calm and shift personalities to well-trained soldiers.

Daryl reluctantly let the handle slide, ignoring the thick thud of the blade to the ground.

Alex collected Jim's arm across her shoulder with one arm secured around his waist. "Come on," she kept her steps slow and accommodating for Jim's comfort. "Let's get you somewhere quiet and safe."

_And as far away from Daryl as I can get you…_

* * *

><p>"Thanks," he felt the fever settling in as they reached the first steps of the Winnebago. His skin was on fire, burning as though the flames of Hell were licking each bit of flesh. It wouldn't be long now; it wouldn't be long at all. His legs began to quiver nearly taking them both down at the first step of the RV. Alex swung her right arm out finding an anchor in way of the door handle. She pushed Jim tighter to her form, keeping the older man from collapsing in the Georgia heat. The fibers of muscle along the left side of her torso and outer thighs burned with the pressure of Jim's deteriorating body.<p>

"I remember why I was digging those holes." His voice was the level of a hoarse whisper.

Alex flung the door open and assisted the wounded man up the steps leaving the rest to sort out the clusterfuck that was escalating behind her. She could hear Daryl cursing like a drunken Navy sailor with Glenn screaming in equal fury. Honestly it was all worthless; worthless as tits on a man.

"Alex, I know why I was digging those holes."

She didn't respond while easing him onto the bench couch. It wasn't a bed but it was better than the alternatives.

"Here," she elevated his legs then drew back the ripped shirt. Blood had caked around the bite wounds, showing where the Walker had sentenced Jim to a fate worse than Death.

"Alex," his tone was urgent catching her attention. Alex stopped examining his injury and met the deep sad stare. It was look she had seen one time too many; on the road from Kansas City to Saint Louis to Memphis to Tupelo. Time and time again the discovery of the bite or even the slight scratch followed by the anguished cries and curses of damning a god that had turned its back on fallen, saintly, and all who fell in between. Parents watching their children succumb to infection only to witness their unholy resurrection before a bullet or blade ended it all; husbands, wives, and friends cast to wayside, collateral damage in war that had no clear side.

Jim collected her hand in his to which Alex covered it with her other one.

"I understand Jim," the lump was swelling in her throat. "I understand now."

"I-I'm sorry I scared everyone."

"Don't be sorry," Alex heavily sighed. "Don't apologize; to me. The others will realize soon enough. It's going to take some time."

"Thank you for understanding."

"Is there anything I can do?"

Comforts for a "dying" man.

"There's nothing," Jim shook his head. A sudden coughing spell racked his body, starting in the lower areas of his lungs. The violent assault scraped rib against tissue, threatening to break ribs. Jim was doubled over, wheezing like an asthmatic. Alex dashed for the kitchenette, flinging and slamming drawers shut until she spied the steel stockpot shinning in the light. Her arm jerked it out as hips pivoted, reaching Jim as the first blackish red mass shot from between his lips, staining his teeth in deep crimson. The surrounding air was polluted with the familiar stench of decay iron and copper. He had a day if he was fortunate but hours were the most likely.

They never lasted more than 22 hours.

_"How long did she last?" Alex brushed a hand over her face. It had been 32 hours since she last slept. The scrubs hanging off her hips and torso were soiled wrinkled and had absorbed everything from blood, vomit, industrial sanitizer, and finally cigarettes. The stench of industrial cleansers and chemicals saturated their senses, blocking out all other scents and odors. The others were in the same boat as she; each on edge, ready to strike like a rattlesnake at the smallest agitation. Wildfire had reached American shores; starting in Detroit of all places before skipping to Erie, Cleveland, Gary, and Chicago. _

_ How in the FUCK did this rise so fast? It was nothing they or any other country had seen or even been documented in all of human history. Maybe it was the End of Days; perhaps that god Alex had been ignoring finally decided to cast judgment upon the whole bloody lot of them. _

_ "17 hours, 35 minutes, and 22 seconds." Her cohort wearily shook his head. Alex couldn't hold back her anger._

_ No one could recall the last time they saw daylight or had a real meal._

_ "It works so fast and we don't have a FUCKING clue what it is! What about the British? The French? Did the South Africans get anywhere?" She was practically screaming at the top of her lungs at this point. "Did Beijing ever return our FUCKING phone calls?!"_

_ "We lost Johannesburg 3 hours ago and London is touch and go. Beijing is unknown."_

_ "Shit! Have we heard from Snow?!" Hands were flailing in the air with feet pacing around in random patterns. Her pulse was quickening and head throbbing. She really needed something strong right about then._

_ "No not yet but Detrick is still online as is Atlanta."_

_ Alex froze and realized she had been holding her breath for the entire heated exchange. Shit, they were all on edge and she shouldn't be snapping at them! Everyone watched as she continued her erratic pacing with arms across her head. No one was judging her as the weight of the world it seemed was dropped on her square shoulders. Jenner was holed up in his own world at CDC, battling against the demons, both real and imaginary. _

_ TS-19 had been the final nail. _

_ "At least we have one thing going for us….."_

"Alex," Jacqui was standing behind her. "Alex….."

Alex blinked and gave her head a brief shake. She turned to face Jacqui, offering a plastered smile.

"Oh Jacqui hey," she felt her nails raking the back of her neck. "I-I didn't hear you."

"Shane's looking for you. He and Rick are up on the hill."

"Right," she nodded then looked to Jim. "Jim, Jacqui's going to stay."

"Okay," his voice wheezed.

"If you need me call me," she squeezed Jacqui's shoulder in a supportive gesture before returning to the waiting sauna.

* * *

><p>"So you gonna say 'I told you so'?"<p>

Shane hurled the scoopful of Georgia dirt aside before addressing his best friend.

_You're needed here Rick. We're stronger in numbers. _

"No," Shane stood in the shallow grave, leaning against the splintered wooden handle. Both had tasked themselves to accomplish what Jim had started the day before. They had started out before dawn, hoping to get ahead of the climbing heat and humidity. But both were covered in a fine coat of sweat which plastered their clothing against their slick skin. It was an opportunity to "hash" things out as Alex had put it.

"But we needed you here Rick. You took half our manpower and guns. If you had stayed maybe the losses wouldn't have been so great."

"And we needed those guns Shane."

"We lost people. Those people would be alive if –"

"Hey," Alex reached the summit. "Jacqui said you were looking for me."

"Yeah," Shane slapped his hands on the hot rocks and soil vaulting his body out of the pit. "We need to talk."

"I'm heading to the CDC," she was abrupt. "With or without you."

Shane sighed and started towards her. Rick watched as Shane's face lightened, shifting into a softer concerned side. Well, this was something new for Shane Walsh.

"I told you I'm going with you and I intend to stick by it."

"Then what's the problem?" Alex was confused.

"A part of me still thinks we should go to Fort Benning. I won't lie to you."

"There's nothing at Benning, Shane. It was overrun."

"How do you know Benning was overrun?" A sliver of disbelief was woven with his words.

"We picked up a radio transmission or rather a distress call before we got here. It was from Benning. The barriers had been breached and they were being overrun. Sorry to dash any fleeting hopes either one of you had. I didn't want to scare the others. It's been a shit night as it is."

Both noticed her clothing was heavily soiled and wrinkled from the grave digging and funeral processions or what passed off as processions. They traded anxious glances as Alex had not slept.

She stood there with arms loosely draped across her shoulders; hands absently running up and down her dirt caked forearms. Her hair was slipping out of the band that held it up and off from her face and neck.

"What do you expect to find at the CDC anyways?" Shane was more curious than demanding.

"If she's still there, there is a person who can help us; at least I hope she can."

"You hope?" Shane grimaced.

"I never said it was a guarantee Shane. But we have no other option now do we?"

"She's right Shane," Rick stopped shoveling and leaned on the shovel. "We don't have much to go on."

"I never doubted Alex," he instantly defended his words. "But what about the others? Will they be so willing to go on chance?"

"I'll talk to the others," he reluctantly agreed.

"Thanks Rick," Alex turned on shaky feet, hoping it wasn't what she feared it was.

_It's just the heat and humidity. I haven't been hydrating like I should._

As she started downhill, Daryl was barreling up in the ancient Ford pickup. Alex decided to stay and reversed her path.

"I still think it's a mistake not burning these bodies. We agreed that's what we'd do right? Burn them all?"

"As long as the brain is destroyed there is no chance of reanimation. I think we covered that part rather sufficiently."

Daryl snorted at Alex's reasoning.

"So the little China man gets all emotional and we suddenly follow his lead? People need to know who the Hell's in charge her."

"And who do you suggest Daryl? Please do speak." She continued on waiting for him to respond.

"There need to be rules here."

"Well there are no rules," Rick interjected. The shoveling and carrying bodies had taken a toll on him already. Shane was clearly growing exhausted as he had been taking more breaks as the day progressed.

"I don't think everyone sees it that way Rick." Alex sadly shook her head and started back down towards the camp.

Shane wanted to go to her but he knew Rick was watching her as well. He couldn't know she had coughed up blood or passed out cold in her tent. He couldn't learn about what was in those cases resting neatly under her cot.

* * *

><p>"CDC?! Back into Atlanta!? Where the Walkers are?! ARE YOU INSANE?!"<p>

Leave it to Glen to call Alex insane.

"Yes because there is a doctor there who was working on a cure. What other option do we have Glen? If you have an idea please do share because I'm all ears. At least we have a chance at shelter and safety there."

"Now I agree with Alex," Rick stood up. "The CDC is our best hope right now. The government would protect it all costs."

"How does she know about this doctor at the CDC?!"

"Because Daryl I was working on the same cure before lights out in Kansas." Alex pinched the bridge of her nose realizing she was going to have to tell them. She couldn't keep it hidden any longer.

"What do you mean you were working on the same cure?! What are you hiding from us?! What you knew about this?!"

"No, Daryl. If you would shut your yap for five minutes and open your ears I'll tell you."

The heaviness of their weighted stares began to bear down on Alex as she stood in the center of their impromptu powwow. It meant questions; questions she didn't have answers to.

"When this whole pandemic started I was working at the National Bio and Agro Defense Facility out in Manhattan, Kansas. We were one of the satellites working with the military and CDC on finding a cure."

"When were you going to tell us about this?" Andrea suddenly shot up. Bleary eyes couldn't deflect the surging anger. Shane stood blocking Andrea from charging on her with Rick ready to help if needed.

"Honestly, I wasn't sure how I could tell all of you. This is why. My affiliation with this was going to ignite some accusations and uncertainty. I was working around the clock; sometimes with no sleep for days. We watched as this thing consumed everyone it touched. The lab was on lockdown. We couldn't leave."

"And what is this thing? Can you tell us that?"

"It could be bacterial, viral, fungal, or anything. But I know it's something entirely new."

Faces dropped except for Shane's. He shifted his eyes towards the ground, fearing someone may catch the knowing look holding steady.

"So what you're telling us is that you have NO idea what this thing could be!?" Andrea was steadily growing angrier. The incredulous expression summed it up for the majority of the group.

"My team was close to cracking the genetic code of it but someone pushed the button out of panic."

"Button?" Lori meekly inquired.

"Yeah, someone higher up decided to sterilize NBAF. I was lucky to have gotten out with my skin intact."

"Jesus," Rick and Jacqui muttered beneath their breaths in tandem.

"Now can you see why going to the CDC is the only viable choice? Can you all understand why it's important to me? To you? To all of us?"

"That's asking a lot," Daryl snorted. "We don't even know you and yet here you are preaching hope like some traveling Baptist minister."

"Shut up," Shane snapped at Daryl.

"It's fine Shane," Alex held up a weary hand. "Let him speak his mind. He's right, no one here knows me. I mean why should they believe me?"

"Because you're the only one making any sense," Rick added. "We should go to the CDC."

"And if you don't like what's there then all of you can go where you want."

No one spoke when Alex left and she didn't expect them to either. It was a lot to consume as they were still burying their dead. But they had to decide. Staying here too long would attract more Walkers and their numbers had been slashed.

* * *

><p>Shane found her at the quarry.<p>

The sun was dipping behind the monolith of stone casting an unnatural aura about her.

"I'm leaving tomorrow morning," she didn't look over her shoulder. There was no need to.

"And I'm going with you."

Alex smiled at Shane's bold stance. It was one of the things that had drawn her to him in the first place.

"What have the others decided on?"

He dropped alongside her, side pressed tightly to hers.

"It sounds like they are leaning towards going to Atlanta."

"I didn't mean to deceive them back there but with the attacks and deaths-"

"Alex," Shane caught her chin in his fingers. "Stop blaming yourself. I know you're going to say you aren't but you are. I saw it in your eyes back there. You feel responsible for this."

"I thought we were close that day."

His fingers slid down towards her hand feeling her fingers curl around them.

"I wasn't lying when I said we don't know what it is."

"Never questioned it. But what happens when we get there and you don't find what you're looking for? What if the CDC is gone?"

"Then I head to Fort Detrick. I told you I have to do this." Alex tightened her grip and with a fleeting smile added, "I hope you'll come with me."

"But what about Rick and the others?"

Her head softly shook. "If they want to go the opposite way I won't stop them. They have to do what's best for them. What if I have another fit? I'm on borrowed time Shane. Eventually someone's going to figure out what's happening and then –"

"NO!" His hands were planted on either side of her face. "No don't you even think that!"

"With the state of everyone's minds you know someone will."

"I won't let it happen. You're not infected! I checked you after the attack."

"I know," she shut her eyes and nodded. "But I think Daryl's trigger happy."

"Yeah well he's hot headed."

"Sounds awfully familiar." A teasing look lifted her eyes.

"There you are."

T-Dog announced his arrival with the marching of his boots.

"Hey T-Dog," Alex offered a short wave.

"The group talked it over and they're going to try Atlanta."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah that's what Daryl said," he laughed.

"How's Jim doing?" She started rising with Shane keeping an arm around her waist. T-Dog noted the subtle gesture but kept quiet. It wasn't his place to say anything.

"Not so good."

"We'll be up in a minute." Shane hoped he would get the veiled message.

"Well everyone's packing up now."

"Alright."

He waited until T-Dog was up and around the trees before speaking.

"Do you really blame Rick for what happened?" Alex spoke up.

Shane was caught off guard by her pointed question. She had heard them talking.

"Well if he had stayed we would've had the numbers."

"Doesn't necessarily mean that's true Shane. We could've been easily overran even with Rick, Daryl, Glenn, and T-Dog here. Cut him some slack would ya? He's your best friend for crying out loud."

Shane was quiet but a sharp smack on his ass snapped him out of the momentary lapse.

"Yeah, yeah you're right."

* * *

><p>Everyone loaded up what they could. Glenn stared longingly at the Charger that was now resting on top of cylinder blocks. Though he had a short window of time with her, he would never forget the beauty.<p>

"Nice bike," Alex took notice of Daryl's ride.

"Thanks," he was cautionary in his reply. "Saw your ride. Whatcha got?"

"2003 Softail Deuce," she spoke with a glint of pride.

"Nice bike," he nodded before loading up the rest of his truck. Shane came over with a piqued look.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah," her hands swept up and down his arms. "Don't worry, Shane, I can hold my own."

"That's what I'm afraid of," he muttered. "So are you going to ride with me?"

"And leave my bike!? It could come in handy. You could ride in the truck with me and let someone else drive the Jeep."

"Fine," Shane huffed but it didn't hold any emotion behind it. "Glenn," he hollered out. "Here!"

Glenn caught the floating ring of brass and steel, a little confused over the gesture.

"Can you drive the Jeep?"

"Sure!" Dale shrugged his shoulders but the kid would be alright. Carol, Sophia, Andrea, and Jacqui were riding with him along with Jim. He thought about what Alex had told them and hoped she was right. But then hope was all they had left.

As her right side eased into the driver's side, Alex suddenly jerked her head to the north.

"I'll be damned," she whispered. Shane caught the sound and followed it until the Apache chopper was careening to the south. Rick wasn't hearing things after all. Could it be the same chopper he had claimed to see in Atlanta?

"I would say Rick wasn't hallucinating," Glenn was the first to acknowledge his error.

"Nope," Dale added.

"Looks like it's heading to Atlanta," Alex trailed a finger through the air.

"Well let's get moving then," Shane swung the door open. "Remember everyone to keep your radios on Channel 40. If you can't pick up the signal or for any reason are having troubles honk once and we'll stop."

"You know the way?" Dale shouted out from the window of the RV.

"Does a bear shit in the woods?"

He flinched at her abrupt but humorous rebuttal. Shane snickered while Lori and Carol cast disproving looks at the choice of wording.

She shrugged off their scolding stares and hopped in.

"I hope you're right on this Alex."

"I hope so too Shane. Because if I'm wrong-"the truck roared to life. "Then I fear I will have put us all in danger."

* * *

><p>The strange but at the same time appropriate looking caravan snaked through the quarry and up the winding gravel road with the Ford F-150 leading the procession. It held the mood on par with a funeral but then again perhaps it was fitting.<p>

Alex said nothing.

One hand was slack across the top of the wheel as the other propped her head away from the window. Shane stole a look, catching the haunted look that settled in.

"You're doing it again."

"Sorry; I didn't realize I was."

Alex swerved her head around, long enough to give Shane a doubting expression.

"Do you think we're making the right choice? Do you think **I'M** making the right choice?"

"Considering we're going back into the 10th level of Hell it's hard to say. But, I said I was coming with you and here I am."

"The others, they didn't seem so sure."

"No one is sure about anything anymore, Alex."

"I have enough blood on my hands. I can't take anymore. You can't take anymore."

She took a ragged breath, feeling lost at that instant. Alex had always known where she was going, what was awaiting her, and who was there. But those pillars had been obliterated from beneath her; from all of them.

"You aren't alone. I'm here."

A weighted warmth came to rest on her mid-thigh. She couldn't but help to cover his hand with hers.

* * *

><p>It was two miles from the quarry a short hard honk cracked the air.<p>

As if running on the same grid, all vehicles came to a rolling stop, falling into line like good little soldiers.

"It's Jim!" Jacqui came charging out and raced directly for the truck. "He's gettin worse."

Before Shane had one foot out, Alex was sprinting for the swinging door.

Carol succeeded in sweeping Sophia out of the way before being barreled over by a charging Alex.

"Jim," Alex froze in the throughway between the front and the kitchenette.

"I-I can't go any further," he was meek and debilitated.

"He's burning up," Jacqui was on the verge of tears.

"My bones feel like glass. Every bump…."

"It's the fever, Jim."

"I keep seeing them…When I shut my eyes; but now, now I can see them in the daylight."

_It's the final symptoms….._

"What do you want me to do Jim?" Alex felt the perspiration leeching from his forehead to the spaces between her fingers.

"I-I can't go any further."

"We're almost to the CDC, Jim." She pleaded with the ill man.

"No, no I can't." His plea was feeble but Alex and Jacqui understood. "Please just leave me here."

"Guys he's deteriorating. He wants to be left here."

"I don't think I can live with that," Shane quietly spoke. He couldn't imagine making a conscious decision to leave Jim alongside the road where a Walker or Walkers could turn him into a buffet.

"Guys," it was Dale who spoke up. "I think it's up to Jim to decide what he wants. When we were back at the quarry and I agreed with Daryl I didn't mean that would should kill him."

"I don't think we should," Rick adamantly shook his head.

"I don't think it's any of our decisions. It sounds like Jim's made his choice."

"Instead of arguing we should honor Jim's wishes." Alex added to Lori's sentiment. "Honestly I don't think he can hold out much longer. The feeling of glass for bones is every nerve ending dying at once. It's excruciating Not to mention he's having hallucinations of Walkers. Who are we to deny him his last rites?"

No one spoke. Seconds passed into minutes. What could they say?

"Alright," Rick scanned everyone's faces for objection.

"No, no I don't need it."

Jim dismissed the offer of the revolver. Rick had insisted he take it but their ailing companion refused it. It had been slow and tedious getting Jim from the RV to the large inviting pine tree alongside the road.

"I would like some water though."

"Sure," Shane went to retrieve a bottle of water.

"Thank you," he summoned what strength lingered, taking the cool plastic bottle around his fingers. "I want to see my family."

Jacqui shed tears as he looked up to her and Dale. The mournful smile crossed his lips as a lone tear rolled down his cheek. She couldn't stand to see him as he was: fading away as his humanity slid like sands in an hourglass. Alex enveloped the sobbing woman, her own sorrow bubbling. Her vision blurred as the stinging tears nipped the corners of her eyes.

"Thank you for…for fightin for us. I'm going to see them you know."

"Yeah, yeah you are." Dale nodded but felt nothing behind it.

"I'll be okay. I'll be okay."

Who was he trying to convince? All present knew the reality of the situation. Jim would die then reanimate as one of those _things._ A soulless creature driven by a long buried instinct, wandering; hunting the living.

Shane looked to Alex who was sweeping her eyes dry. The narrow webbing of crimson crossed the sea of light pink tinge. He observed her comforting Jacqui who was shaken by the loss of another. The older woman's head was bobbing long and deep with the occasional hiccup shaking her already trembling shoulders.

He waited until Alex was alone and slowly approached. She gave Jim a final farewell in the form of a nod.

"You gonna be alright?"

Her hand stopped mid lift of the door handle. Bleary pools locked with his uncertain ones.

"That ship sailed a long time ago Shane."


	16. Chapter 16

_**A/N: **_I don't own anyone but Alex...But a certain sheriff shakes his head adamantly...

* * *

><p>"You okay over there?"<p>

Alex barely lifted her head in Shane's direction.

"Depends on what your definition of okay is. Right now, I don't know what I am. I can feel the doubt lingering. Doubt over if I'll find the cause of this damned plague; doubt over if I'll find a treatment let alone a fucking cure. I don't know what to expect in Atlanta."

"I don't know if you want to hear this but they had dropped napalm on the city back when the military barriers were overrun."

Her fingers curled tighter around the wheel.

"Those assholes are dropping napalm on Kansas City! FUCKING NAPALM! That's what they did to the gooks in 'Nam! I think that was their grand solution. That's always the solution: Bomb or shoot then ask questions."

Shane wondered what she meant by that.

"I'll take the back route. It won't be as heavily traveled or rather was."

"You've been here before?" His voice picked up by a few octaves.

"Yeah, a few times for a few exercises. One was a smallpox attack and the other was a viral hemorrhagic fever that came in from a flight based out of London. The third was….."

_ "Alright people listen up!"_

_ Alex and her team gathered with the converging members of government, private sector, military, and medical care in the Emergency Operations Center. Doctor Snow stood at the front, tall and alert. His steely eyes floated around the room, watching everyone fall in. He spotted Alex and her group from Manhattan, the Georgia National Guard 48th Combat Brigade adjacent to them. She was casually conversing with the tall one, the corporal. They were supposed to be the escort and security detail for her group._

_ "Good Morning! My name is Doctor John Snow with the United States Army Medical Research Institute of Infectious Disease. Today is Day 1 of Operation Georgia Heat. This will be a test of our communications, coordination, security, medical, logistics, planning, and operations capabilities. All you know is that an unknown emerging disease has shown up at Hartsfield Jackson International. The victims have been transported to Emory University Hospital and are isolated."_

_ "What do you think he's got planned for us?" Alex turned to the corporal. Hints of anxiety creased his features as his eyes sized her up._

_ "If it's like the smallpox and viral hemorrhagic fever scenarios it won't be anything we haven't had thrown at us before."_

_ "You seem pretty comfortable."_

_ Her lips drew into an amused smile. He couldn't but help to smile back. Two rows of pearl coated with a dusting of light gold told her he drank coffee like water._

_ "Corporal Brad, I work in a Level A suit with a hose hooked up at my back and face down things that there is no vaccine, treatment, or cure for."_

_ "Hard core?" His light laugh was shaky._

_ "I love the sight of Ebola in the morning Corporal." Her grin widened as his dropped into an incredulous stare._

Alex hoped he and the rest of the unit had survived this. Perhaps they will run across them.

* * *

><p>The sun was dipping lower behind the Appalachians; soon their advantage would vanish.<p>

"We're almost there. I can see parts of the CDC past those taller ones. I just hope they're still there."

Her eyes darted from the rear view to the road. Everyone was still following in line. God she hoped they were making the right choice.

The wayward caravan came alongside the curb, greeted by the carnage. The tentacles of death crept through the windows and vents, permeating the air with the malodorous trails of death. It could be described as ranging from rotted flesh to stagnant putrid rivers of egesta cooking in the sun.

"Front access is there," Alex pointed over the accumulated piles of stiffs. Blood saturated the walkways which converged to the impressive main entrance. Humvees sat silent, witnesses to the carnage that had played out weeks before. The barricades had failed as the dead were not only military but also civilian.

"I have a bad feeling about this." Shane sighed.

"Let's haul ass." Alex hurled her bag across her chest and darted for the building. Her movements were fluid and calculated while his and Rick's were hesitant. Rick and Shane exchanged a concerned glance as they raced to keep up but ensure the others didn't fall behind.

"Shit, it looks like no one's here. The security doors are down."

"That doesn't mean anything. It could've been part of the procedure."

It was growing darker outside and they were open out there in spans grass and concrete.

"It's obvious no one is here!" Daryl hissed but every scanning the area.

"We're not safe out here!" Lori was beginning to panic. Carol wasn't too far behind her. Carl and Sophia were growing upset, picking up on their mothers' cues. "What are we going to do?!"

"I say we turn around and get the HELL out of here."

"And go where Daryl? We have no food or gas." Andrea was quick to dash that hope. "We won't make it any further!"

"Someone is here!" Alex continued pounding furiously on the door then glared at the security camera pointed downward like some disapproving parent. "Hey! If someone is there I'm Doctor Alexandra Koch from the National Bio and Agro-Defense Facility in Manhattan Kansas! For the love of GOD please open up these FUCKING doors!"

"Walker!" T-Dog hollered. The animated corpse with the tattered military uniform stumbled towards them. Their scent was akin to blood in water. Carl and Sophia started to scream and clung to their mothers.

Daryl took it out with one shot, clean between the eyes. Soon a second, third, fourth, and fifth appeared. Panic was sweeping through like a plague.

"Alex we need to go now!" Rick gripped her bicep and urgently pulled her back but Alex contracted her legs, planting them harder to the walkway.

"NO!" She wrestled from his hold. "GODDAMN IT I AM NOT LEAVING!"

"Damn it Alexandra," Shane went for her but Alex sidestepped his effort. He growled with irritation but wasn't about let her commit a fool's act.

"Guys we need to leave NOW!" T-Dog had a bat in hand, ready to crush the shells that were the Walkers' skulls. Shane caught Alex off guard and hoisted her over his left shoulder. Her fists assaulted his back repeatedly but he shook it off. He was five steps closer to the vehicles when hydraulics groaned to life and the shutters lifted upward streaming the life giving glow into the cold and dark. The light blinded some but was welcomed by all. Someone had heard their pleas.

Shane, still carrying Alex, rushed the doors with Rick, T-Dog, and Daryl ushering the women and others inside.

* * *

><p>"Put me down Shane Walsh!"<p>

She had graduated to using her boots to strike the tops of his thighs, coming dangerously close to a certain region. Shane let her down, catching the incensed stare. Alex turned around, greeted with a man dressed shabbily in sleep pants, wrinkled white shirt, and athletic sandals which was accentuated with an assault rifle directed at them. His face was unshaven and hair disheveled. Deep creases around his eyes and forehead aged him at least 20 years.

"Doctor Koch," he addressed Alex coolly.

"Are you the only one Edwin?" Alex could feel the burden of everyone's quizzical stares beating down from behind.

"Afraid so." His answer was one of deep sorrow and regret but it was shaken off with the shift in demeanor. "Is anyone infected?"

"One," Rick stepped up. "But he didn't make it."

"Did John tell you I was coming?"

"I lost contact with everyone about 45 days ago. Why are you here?"

Alex realized he was asking Rick who stood inches behind her.

"We just want a chance."

"That's asking an awful lot these days."

"These folks aren't bad Edwin. Will you at least give them a damned chance? In case you haven't noticed, civilization went the way of the Roman Empire."

Edwin stared back at her, briefly glancing at her bag which hung faithfully by her side.

"Fine," he lowered the weapon. "But get what you need now because once those door close they won't open back up. Plus everyone submits to a blood test. That's the price of admission."

"That's fine," Rick eagerly nodded.

"Thanks Edwin," Alex smiled and sprinted for the Jeep.

"I'm not sure if you'll be saying that later." He whispered beneath his breath.

"Shane, grab the cases and I'll get the bags. Ask Edwin where to put them but don't let the others hear you."

"Right," Shane clutched the cases as Alex gathered the bags. While the loads were burdensome, each could move with little difficulty.

Shane sprinted in first, raising an eyebrow at Jenner.

"Paperwork," he cryptically responded.

"Right," Jenner nodded in a knowing manner. "Hang on to them."

The remaining members of the group scurried inside as Jenner threw the switch to lower the shutters and the outside world. The reverberation of metal smacking concrete made Alex and Shane shudder as they followed Jenner into the heart of the CDC.

"Do doctors always go around packing heat?" Daryl spoke up, asking what everyone else was afraid to.

"There were plenty left lying around and I familiarized myself."

_ I wonder why…_

Alex pondered in silence with partial sarcasm. She wanted to say something smart but bit her tongue. All she wanted was food and a place to crash before getting to work.

"Why are we getting tested? None of us are running a fever." Andrea protested weakly as Jenner held her arm steady then retracted the needle. It was placed neatly in a vacant slot, joining its siblings on the beige rack.

"I'm already breaking every protocol and policy letting you in."

"I really don't think that's an issue Edwin." Shane quietly snickered at her dry reply.

"I see you didn't lose your sense of humor Alex."

"Yeah I'm just a regular comedian these days."

Edwin wrapped up the blood draws, allowing Andrea to rise. She was on her feet for a few seconds before nearly crumpling in an exhaustive heap.

"Is she alright?" Edwin had turned around in time to see Jacqui catching her.

"She hasn't eaten in days; no one has." Her slender but surprisingly powerful hold kept Andrea upright until she could rest in the closest chair.

"The power to the dormitories have been shut down but the offices have couches that turn into pull out beds."

Edwin played gracious host, pointing out the available rooms.

"There are bathrooms in each one; water still runs though. Oh but please go easy on the hot water."

A collective gasp rippled through the group. Did he just say hot water?!

* * *

><p>Everyone fell into the vacant rooms, sloughing bags and guns off their bodies. Alex claimed the last room on the right, the furthest away from everyone else. She staked out her new accommodations, noting the shower was stocked with soap and shampoo, a chilling sight to her eyes. A shiver coursed down her spine, but the feeling was shaken off as she returned to the main room.<p>

"Hey," Shane poked his head in the door. "Got room for one more?"

Alex straightened up and tossed the pad aside.

"Always," she waved him in. Shane stepped in, closing the door behind him. Alex closed the distance between them as if she was worried the walls had ears. "What did Edwin say?"

"Hang on to the paperwork."

"Okay," she nodded. "Put them on the desk for now. I'll take them with me when I head downstairs."

"You think you'll find anything?" He treated the cases as if he was handling eggs.

"I don't know but I hope so. It depends on the shape the lab's in."

"You sure you wanna be messing around with that stuff?" His hand waved dismissively at them.

"Marie Curie gave her life to science and saving others; literally might I add because of the aplastic anemia she developed from working with x-rays during World War I. This is no different Shane."

"This isn't radiation Alex. We have no idea what this is. All we know is that one scratch or bite and lights out. You saw what happened to Amy and Jim. I don't want the same happening to you."

"It won't," she shook her head. "The agent has to be introduced into the blood stream. Inhaling it doesn't equate infection or else we would all be walking corpses."

Alex had a point but it wasn't enough to quell his growing anxieties.

"Look, I traveled all the way from Kansas with those cases, following established protocols and procedures to keep that shit in. The only way those tubes are being cracked is in a lab with me in a suit."

She pulled the couch out and examined the mattress. It was covered with a flimsy sheet and double layering of blankets that suspiciously looked military issue. Compared to what passed as bedding, this was on par with the Ritz.

_ Probably housed soldiers during the chaos….._

"At least we don't have to worry about Walkers here."

"Nope," she sighed. "Unless they figure out how to crack the security."

Shane cast a weird look which drew a smile on her lips.

"Kidding Shane."

The abrupt clap of her hand on his knee startled the lawman. "I heard Edwin boasting there was a cache of booze in the cafeteria. You should go stake your claim on the Jack before Daryl or one of the others gets to it first. I'm going to review some notes before heading down there. As much as I would love to down a bottle of Yellow Tail Red I have to be clear minded."

"You know everyone will wonder where you are."

"You can tell them I'm working on some notes or something. You were the king of excuses in high school so it shouldn't be anything far fetched."

"No," Shane shook his head. "Not leaving you here alone."

"I know you're hungry Shane. Your stomach talked the entire way here. Go, eat. I'll shower and go work then raid the kitchen after I'm done. It was my routine at NBAF."

"That was NBAF. This is different."

"How Shane? How is this different than NBAF?"

She wasn't expecting the answer to come in the form of Shane leaning over, slipping his hands across her face and capturing her lips with his. It was sweet and soft, letting her melt into his touch. They remained together in their tender embrace until Shane gently pulled away. His thumbs tenderly caressed the burning skin as he spoke.

"That; that is what's different."

Alex leaned against him, tapping foreheads with his, letting her eyes fall closed. Her hand sought his touch. Shane clutched her hand, intertwining their fingers. The calloused heat radiated off his skin, absorbing into her chilled flesh.

"I thought about you a lot. When this started I wasn't sure-"

"Shhh," he silenced her with his finger. "Come here."

Alex scooted across the bed, snuggling against him as his arms encircled her.

"I thought about you too."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Took you moving away for me to see what I missed out on."

"Took your ass long enough." Shane lightly laughed.

"Yeah, yeah it did."

"The Great Shane Walsh, master of pranks, and sexual conqueror extraordinaire…..Remember that Halloween night we dressed the mannequin up in my dad's uniform and took it to Mark Burnett's party then positioned it in random windows scaring the shit out of the jocks?!"

"That was classic! You were ingenious." Shane couldn't but help to beam at the nostalgic moment.

"And they swore up and down my dad was there as they stampeded like cattle!"

"Definitely proud of that one."

"Yep," Alex knew the former ruling elite were dead, gone, or worse now. Memories were the only thing they could cling to aside from one another. "Those were the days."

The air settled, growing heavier as reality returned.

"You guys are all I have left."

Shane held her tighter and kissed her forehead, refusing to let her go astray.

"Whatever you need me to do to help, I'll do it. If you can find a way to stop this I'll do whatever it takes to make sure you do it."

"Thanks Shane," Alex breathed into his sleeve.

"Feel like getting cleaned up before heading out?"

"Sure," she grinned.

Shane pulled back, collecting the bottom of her shirt. Alex lifted her arms over her head, letting the tight conforming cotton slip away. It fluttered somewhere on the floor. Alex felt slightly nervous sitting there partially unclothed. But her body leaned forward, gripping the partially stretched cotton around his waist and tugging it with short demanding jerks.

"Hey easy," he light laughed and wiggled out of the shirt. The light did no justice for the muscular torso kissed with a farmer's than. "Clothing is hard to come by."

"Sorry," she chuckled nervously then stood, starting to unfasten the belt looped tightly around her waist. She had lost weight since fleeing Manhattan, the pants having once been a little snug around her hips.

"Wait," his hands came to rest upon her shaky ones. "Let me."

Alex followed his lead, gathering the police issued belt in her awkward fingers. She liked to think she was in a dream, except it wasn't. She was in the belly of the CDC, more specifically an abandoned office with the one person she didn't dare fathom she would have seen alive again, stripping one another down.

Shane tugged the cargo pants down and around her hips, allowing him to peek at the simple blue bikini briefs. Her body was perfect as far as he was concerned. A few slivers of silvery flesh traced across the light toned canvas, shining like moonlight against the subtle lighting. His fingers searched out the spaghetti straps, pinching them tight between his lightly trembling fingers then sliding them down her narrow shoulders. She wiggled out of the restrictive threads, allowing her breasts to bounce free. The chill in the air summoned the sensitive buds to protrude from their resting places. His tongue darted around the chapped lips, moistening them with a thin layer of saliva.

"I think we have time to get a little dirty before we clean up," his voice rumbled like thunder, ushering shivers down her spine.

"I think so too," the wicked grin grew across her lips. Alex fisted the layer of midnight fiercely between her fingers, ripping it up and over his head. Their bodies collapsed in a tangled heap of limbs and loose clothing with an occasional groan of the springs beneath them.

Shane took a deep breath, believing he was dreaming this. All through high school he had done everything possible to capture Alex's attention. But she had been into Rick and he had stepped back. Then they broke up but remaining close. His hopes had been lifted then savagely dashed when she went to Kansas.

"Alex..." he whispered with lingering uncertainty.

"No Shane you're not dreaming." To prove her point she slipped a hand past the worn elastic band and gently took him into a gentle grip. Slow but pulsing sweeps of skin against skin caused shudders of pleasure to ignite across his body.

His hips bucked sharply, smacking into the perfect circle of skin. It wasn't enough!

Fumbling fingers unhooked and tore the zipped wide apart. The only that his mind could comprehend was breaching that gray cotton barrier.

The powerful hands tightened against the top of the cargo pants, wanting nothing between them. She eagerly slipped out, laying on the flimsy fold out couch; legs slightly apart as the cool aura of the desk lamp bathing their bodies in light gold.

"Shane, wait," Alex sat up a little off the mattress.

"Alex what is it?" Anxiety smothered the burning lust. "What's wrong?"

"Wait, just a sec," she pecked his cheek then leaped off the bed and towards her bag. He tried looking over to see what she was doing. But he wouldn't be left waiting for too long.

Perched fiercely in the grip of her finger and thumb was a square foil wrapper.

"Before you open your mouth," she hurried back and rested a finger on his lips. "This got swept up when we were doing a supply raid. Ash's idea. She said 'Alex, I don't care if it's the fucking zombie apocalypse sex is gonna happen regardless! Never know when the chance will pop up.'"

While his spirits were slightly dampened at the prospect, Shane knew what she was implying.

"Still-" he tore the foil from her hold, rising and losing the pants and boots. He hurried but slowed when his fingers carefully guided the precious prophylactic over his straining erection. Her eyes followed the skilled digits as they unrolled the thin layer of rubber until came to rest at the base of his cock.

His caught the glazed stare focused on him, finding the need surging back.

One knee dipped into the bed then the other until he was on his knees, hovering over her. Shane felt his heart hammering against his ribcage as his body lowered down on its own accord. The searing warmth of his body fanned across her skin, chasing away the cold that had moments before bit her flesh.

"Lift your hips," the low seductive growl thundered in her ear.

She closed her eyes and arched her body, thighs quivering at the sensation of latex nudging between her legs.

"Oh my god." The intrusive thickness slowly penetrated, filling her completely. She was panting, hard, as they lay there locked as one.

"Jesus you feel so good."

Shane felt the burning walls constricting around him as he slowly thrust his hips. Alex swore she was going to come right then and there with the first movement.

"So good," Shane moaned into her neck and chest. His hands couldn't cease exploring her as his mouth and tongue slid over the smooth canvas of light peach and pink. Callouses turned to silk against her body, attentive fingers that caressed and fondled the ample breasts and pert buds.

"Fuck," Alex gasped. She could only brace her arms across his back and dig her heels hard against his ass as he drove slow but deep inside. It was amazing. The sensations coursing through her nerves and cells couldn't have words to describe what she was experiencing.

Shane captured her partially swollen lips with his, devouring her mouth and tongue with animalistic ferocity. His tongue ran over and around hers, sweeping it into a passionate but heated dance.

The frame of the bed squealed and groaned; loud enough for anyone who happened to walk by to hear the lovers through the door. But neither one noticed or cared as the world and its horrors were shut out.

The high pitched moans resonating from her throat was a sweet song upon Shane's ears. A smile crept across his lips as it was a song that many had sung in his arms. She was getting close.

Her body thrashed wildly, riding the waves of the mind blowing orgasm that rippled from her lower body. The smaller hips slammed recklessly to his, smearing the tops of his thighs and balls with the golden honey of her essence. Christ! He could feel the slick walls pulsating harder and faster, drawing his own burning from the depths of his body. A part of him wanted to rip the damned thing off and let nothing interfere when he felt the sweet rush of euphoria claim him. He wanted to mark her, to show that no other man would EVER touch her like this again.

No, no he couldn't.

Shane was rutting now, letting the primal urges take over. The coiling at the base of his cock was increasing, ready to explode. The continued ripples that kissed his aching member drew it closer; each push in bringing him tot he same heights of ecstasy that Alex continued to revel in beneath him. His hands sought hers, locking together in a vise like grip and Shane simply whispered her name.

"Alex..."

He couldn't see as his vision was blinded by the white hot light that flooded his sight. The tendons in his neck and shoulders tensed and protruded through the skin; his body momentarily paralyzed. He swore his heart had ceased beating in that brief moment.

The first sound he detected was the racing of her heart.

Shane realized his head was across her chest but remained there. Her fingers were carding through his unruly hair, occasionally raking her nails gently along his scalp producing a calming effect inside. Adrenaline continued streaming along the rivers of red and blue; gradually declining in power.

"You ready for that shower now?"

He nuzzled between the sweat dabbed mounds.

"I'll take that as a no," Alex lightly chuckled.

"Not yet," he bemoaned. Shane was living out what his teenage mind had been fantasizing about.

"Alright," she kissed his forehead. The lab could wait for five more minutes.

The pair spent the next several minutes letting their eyes and fingers wander across the other's body. The pendant he wore flashed in the light a few times.

"You still have it."

"Yep, I never take it off."

As the pair basked together, they remained ignorant of the audience they had attracted.

* * *

><p>Lori pulled away from the door, unable to hear what they were saying or doing. She had seen Shane vanish into the room after Alex then the door was shut and locked. Waiting had been easy and Lori slipped from the group, curious to know what was going on.<p>

Her face had darkened at the other's name being called out by Shane. Yet she had told him to stay away from her and Carl though here she was, being a closet voyeur, eavesdropping on Shane fucking Alex.

She placed her ear back to the door, wondering what was going on.

The heavy groaning of the pull out bed alerted her that someone was moving. Lori stumbled back, smacking into the wall before making a hasty retreat from the corridor.

Glen had watched her take off, frowning at her interest in Shane and Alex. What was she so concerned about? He had watched her for at least a good 10 minutes from the doorway of his room. Lori had been so engrossed in what was happening behind that door she didn't hear his open. What was the big deal? So what if Alex and Shane were in there doing who knows what? Well, he had a good idea of what they were doing but it wasn't their business. Still, he found the observation uneasy.

"There you are," Dale came around the corner. Glen yelped and jumped up swearing he would have a cardiac right on the spot. His hand clutched over his heart as he attempted to calm himself down.

"What's wrong?" The older man implored.

"You scared me! I didn't hear you coming." He laughed nervously but panted slightly.

"Well, our host has opened the cafeteria up. Where's Alex and Shane?"

"I haven't seen them." He shrugged. "Probably in the room they picked; whichever one that is."

"Uh huh," Dale wearily eyed the younger man before heading the opposite way.

**Yes I SERIOUSLY believe Lori would do this if she didn't think anyone was around. I hold the belief she wanted to keep Shane and Rick around and Season 2 only confirmed my theory. Not in this world! HELL NO! Shane needs to be with someone else who isn't cray cray! If he seems OOC it's because he's not hung up on crazy bitch :)**


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